This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants Pest of the West short "Yokel to Tough Guy," which aired on April 15, 2008.
- [SpongeBuck sitting on a swing with a guitar]
- Narrator: With just a couple minor adjustments, anyone can go from yokel to tough guy!
- SpongeBuck: Wow, even me?
- Narrator: Even you. [real hands take SpongeBuck and set him on a board]
- SpongeBuck: I'm ready to be tough.
- Narrator: Good, 'cause this city-slicker necktie has got to go. [scissors cut his bow-tie off] And this hat...ridiculous. [real fingers flick his hat off] Now all you need is some uncut facial hair [appear], a handlebar mustache [appear], a scar [appear]...
- SpongeBuck: Ow!
- Narrator: ...tough guy hat [appear], gloves [appear], bandanna [appear], boots [appear], and lastly that ol' tough guy scowl [real fingers push SpongeBuck's eyebrows down].
- SpongeBuck: Ain't nobody gonna mess with me now.
- Pecos Patrick: [comes in looking like a tough guy] What'd you say?
- SpongeBuck: [scared] Please don't hurt me! [runs away without all the tough guy getup]