While at the Bikini Bottom Mall, SpongeBob and Patrick find shirts that say "Best Friend" with an arrow pointing. This arrow points to the side, indicating the wearer's best friend—SpongeBob's shirt points to his left, and Patrick's to his right, therefore when they stand beside one another, their shirts point at each other. However, when either of them faces a different direction, the arrow points elsewhere, thus "sending out the wrong signals." So, they decide to look for new friendship clothes. SpongeBob finds a group of citizens who were putting on an annual event, which was reenacting the historical Battle of Bikini Bottom. SpongeBob and Patrick approach them and then SpongeBob asks one of the soldiers where him and his friends get their cool outfits. However, the fish stated that he did not have friends and that he hates just about everyone here. SpongeBob then hears about the Battle of Bikini Bottom. He is told that there were two factions, the clean, who spend all their time washing their hands and the dirty, who had better things to do then wash their hands.
They then had a war over who is better. Patrick tells SpongeBob the tale wrong, saying that the dirty won, annoying the other fish, and making them walk away. SpongeBob and Patrick begin to argue and then they get uniforms and start their own war. After many times of attacking each other, SpongeBob gets dirtier while Patrick ends up cleaner from each other's various attacks. Patrick then picks his nose and chases SpongeBob into the Krusty Krab. SpongeBob runs by Mr. Krabs, yelling that Patrick is digging for "gold," which he takes for real but leaves the kitchen disappointed. SpongeBob attacks Patrick with food until Patrick grabs two Krabby Patties and uses them for socks. Angrily, SpongeBob fills up with fury making him blow up. Outside, SpongeBob swallows a soap bar and prepares to make Patrick clean. Patrick picks up an entire dumpster and throws it at SpongeBob when he refuses to stand down. Patrick is made squeaky clean and SpongeBob is covered from the trash from the dumpster. The fish reenacting the battle come and see the two friends forgiving each other and tells them that it is not over until they have a winner. SpongeBob then explains to them to not remember events that divide them, but recall what brings them together. Then the fish who were doing the reenactment chose to do something "more manly": football, hockey or knitting fluffy sweaters. Then, SpongeBob and Patrick go home as the episode ends.
( ‣ ) Associated production music
( • ) Original music
( ◦ ) SpongeBob music
‣Fife and Drum March - Larry Hochman [title card] ‣Shoppers World - Harry Bluestone [opening] ‣Colonial March - Larry Hochman ["You mean like those guys?"] ‣We Shall Return! 2 - Udi Harpaz [Patrick talks about the Battle of Bikini Bottom] ‣Steel Sting - Jeremy Wakefield ["Ugh! That's not what happened!"] ‣Gator - Steve Belfer [flashbacks] ‣Seaweed - Steve Belfer ["Well, then, I guess we can't be friends."] ‣Colonial March - Larry Hochman ["I am joining the other side!"] ‣Grass Skirt Chase - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob gives Patrick a pedicure] ‣ ? [harp music] ‣Skipping to School - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [Patrick's morning breath] ‣Grass Skirt Chase - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob brushes Patrick's teeth] ‣The Jitters - Raymond C. Jones [deodorant spray] ‣Hawaiian Link (b) - Richard Myhill ["My beautiful pit stink... it's gone!"] ‣Team Trophy - Sammy Burdson, John Charles Fiddy ["It's booger time!"] ‣Drama Link (d) - Hubert Clifford [Patrick picks his nose] ‣Inferno - Fredric Bayco [Patrick chasing SpongeBob] ‣Vibe Sting - Nicolas Carr ["Gold?!"] ‣Steel Sting (a) - Jeremy Wakefield ["Did you get any of Patrick's gold?"] ‣Inferno - Fredric Bayco [SpongeBob throws onions at Patrick] ‣ ? ["That does it!"] ‣Hawaiian Party - Jan Rap, Peter Smid [patty socks] ‣Tension Bits - Nicolas Carr, Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield ["Grrrrr! You stop that right now!"] ‣Sponge Monger - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [Patrick throws dumpster at SpongeBob] ‣Steel Licks (d) - Jeremy Wakefield ["I'm covered in muck and scum!"] ‣Vibe Q Sting - Nicolas Carr [SpongeBob, Patrick thinking] ‣You're Nice - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield ["All right!"] ‣Royal Wedding - Harry Bluestone, Emil Cadkin [SpongeBob's speech] ‣Puka A - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [ending]
This is the second episode to have a title card background on a pirate map. The first was "Arrgh!"
The closeup of SpongeBob's teeth was featured in the SpongeBob game: Cavity Crisis.
In this episode, Patrick says he has never washed his hands. However, in the episode "Something Smells," Patrick is seen washing his hands in the movie theater bathroom. It's possible that "Something Smells" happened after this episode.
In the flashback, the person who represented the dirty in the bathroom looked and sounded just like Patrick. He may either be an ancestor of Patrick, or a good enough person to show how dirty they were.
In this episode, it shows that Patrick's eyes are navy blue. Although, in "Wormy," his eyes are green, and in "Oral Report," they are jade. It is possible that his eye color varies between episodes, like his stupidity, as revealed by Patrick in "Tentacle-Vision."
The Battle of Bikini Bottom could be a parody of the Revolutionary War, judging from the military uniforms. The red-coated soldiers have British accents in the flashback, and the blue coats have American accents. This is a reversal of the actual war, in which the Patriots wore blue, and the British wore red.
When Patrick says "Hopping... clams!" the captions say "Hopping... crabs."
After SpongeBob pedicured Patrick, the chair and bucket of water in the background is gone.
SpongeBob also painted Patrick's toe nails red. After he turns to SpongeBob and says "You sick little Monster!" and "Feast my morning breath!" the red nail polish is gone.
If you play the scene where Mr. Krabs runs into the kitchen looking for gold frame by frame, you can see the door actually opened before Mr. Krabs pushed it.
On disc 13 of The First 100 Episodes DVD, it lists this episode as "Battle of Bikini Bottom" without included the word "the" in the title.
If one listens closely after Pat loses his armpit hair, one can hear him coughing and choking even though his mouth does not move.
In one scene, SpongeBob's eyelashes disappear for a split second.
In the scene with the Bikini Bottomites firing with their cannons, certain trash lands in the air, so it appears floating.