- Sea urchins
- Patrick Star
- SpongeBob SquarePants
- Frankie Billy
- Shelly Fishbowl
- Nat Peterson
- Harold "Bill" Reginald
- Sheldon J. Plankton (cameo)
- Larry the Lobster (cameo)
- Fish on the Camp Flabbee Gone bus
- Squidward Tentacles
- Security guards
- One of the Olafs
- Abigail Marge
- Jennifer Millie
- Martha Smith
- Nathiel Waters
- Norma Rechid
- Tina Fran
- Debbie Rechid
- Jimmy Gus
- Nancy Suzy Fish
- Sheldon the Fish
- Taylor Fishbowl
- Other audience members
The episode starts as SpongeBob and Patrick walking to each other and then they start to play - the idea of their game is to holler at the vehicles that pass by, which angers Squidward and some of the people in the vehicles. Then, Patrick falls asleep and when he wakes up he has a beard. Then, Squidward passes by and offers to teach Patrick everything he knows about how to be mature which upsets SpongeBob. SpongeBob decides to follow them promising he will learn how to be mature as well.
The three go into Squidward's house for a grown-up makeover. SpongeBob shows off his new look. Patrick likes his look until Squidward reminds him that he really shouldn't.
They then go to a restaurant, and Patrick and Squidward order some tetrazzini while SpongeBob orders the milk and cookies.
Then, they go to the art place and SpongeBob follows them around and Patrick and Squidward tell the security to kick him out and he first put him out softly, but he doesn't leave so he ends up kicking him. SpongeBob sees Squidward and Patrick walking and Squidward mentions that the beard was the best thing that ever happened to Patrick other than himself. SpongeBob tries to remove his beard to restore his friendship. Squidward stops him and says that they are through with him.
Then, Squidward and Patrick go to the Opera House and they see a lady which is really SpongeBob singing opera which Patrick says "she's beautiful."
After SpongeBob sang opera to win Patrick back, Patrick begins to cry and sees the beard is really a sea urchin and the sea urchin woke up and ran away from Patrick. He chased it until SpongeBob says Patrick's name and he says "How do you know my name?" and he says that he is SpongeBob and they make up again then Squidward told all the guests that the show is horrible, but they disagree and threw food at him then the episode ends.
|( ‣ ) Associated production music|
|( • ) Original music|
|( ◦ ) SpongeBob music|
‣ ? [title card]
‣ SpongeBob History Song - Nicolas Carr, Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [opening]
‣ Vibe Sting - Nicolas Carr [Patrick snoring]
‣ The Pollywog Strut - Nicolas Carr, Barry Anthony [SpongeBob pinches Patrick]
‣ Unknown Hawaiian Sting (l) - "I do?"
‣ Fooling Around - Barry Anthony ["Everybody knows that grownups never play with kids."]
‣ Lap Steel - Nicolas Carr [Hawaiian sting]
‣ Lite Conversation - Nicolas Carr, Barry Anthony ["Let me escort you to my place."]
‣ Steel Sting (b) - Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob laughs]
‣ Gorgeous Girl - Kurt Schick [personal grooming]
‣ Little England - Paddy Kingsland [Bikini Bottom Men's Club]
‣ ? [SpongeBob dancing]
‣ Airs and Graces (a) - Paddy Kingsland [dinner]
‣ Thieving Magpie Overture - Gioacchino A. Rossini [art museum]
‣ Steel Sting (a) - Jeremy Wakefield ["Security!"]
‣ Nude Sting - Nicolas Carr [SpongeBob kicked out]
‣ Unknown Track 35 - Pat Irwin [Squidward, Patrick leave the museum]
‣ Danger Sign - Harry Bluestone, Emil Cadkin ["I must remove that beard."]
‣ Armed Attack - Jean Clero ["That's it! It must be done!"]
‣ Unknown Track 35 - Pat Irwin [Squidward chews out SpongeBob]
‣ Steel Sting - Jeremy Wakefield ["You've only gone up three steps."]
‣ Fanfares 18 C Maj - Marcin Pospieszalski ["The famed Bikini Bottom...!"]
‣ Baroque Fin 22 C Maj - Marcin Pospieszalski ["...Opera House!"]
◦ Dear Friend - Aaron Springer, Gary Stockdale [SpongeBob sings]
‣ Steel Licks (b) - Jeremy Wakefield [Patrick cries]
‣ Unknown Track 35 - Pat Irwin [sea urchin leaves]
‣ Busy Finale 07 B Maj - Marcin Pospieszalski ["Oh, please! You can call me Patrick!"]
‣ Fanfares 18 C Maj - Marcin Pospieszalski [audience cheers]
‣ ? [ending]
- This episode is available on the Disorder in the Deep, SpongeBob and Friends: Patrick SquarePants, and Complete Eighth Season DVDs.
- As of September 30, 2017, The Internet Movie Database (IMDB) gives this episode a rating of 6.7/10 based on 97 ratings by users. TV.com users give this episode a 8.0/10 based on 111 votes.
- There was a promo for the episode when "Sentimental Sponge" premiered and it featured a clip from this episode, but the episode didn't air then.
- This episode was part of SpongeBob's Summer of New Premieres in June 2011 (see promo below).
- This episode was originally going to be called "Old Man Patrick" but it was changed to "Squidward's School for Grown-Ups."
- Larry's S.U.B. truck from "Drive Thru" makes a small reappearance in this episode.
- When Squidward taught Patrick how to act like a grown-up, it's similar to when Patrick taught SpongeBob how to act like one in "Grandma's Kisses."
- In this episode, Squidward says that adults should never play with children, give each other high fives or have fun, which is not exactly true. This could just be just an example of Squidward's snobbish ways and his own views of maturity.
- Squidward said something similar to this in the episode "Snowball Effect" when he was debating with SpongeBob and Patrick on whether if snowball fights are for children or adults.
- Running Gags: Squidward mumbling to himself, and SpongeBob and Patrick Boat Screaming by different vehicles.
- Note that when Squidward and Patrick were walking toward the Opera House Squidward changes clothing, from just a simple red bowtie and his regular brown shirt to a full-on formal shirt, vest, purple bow tie, and jacket, it is possible that before that scene that Squidward went back to his house to change.
- The paper that SpongeBob originally took out while on stage had the infamous "There once was a man from Nantucket," limerick, which is known for being very risqué.
- The sea urchin was much like a bush, and no one was afraid of it, unlike the urchins in "Eek, an Urchin!"
- Ironically, one of the things thrown at Squidward was a pineapple.
- This is the second time Patrick uses a lot of big words for nearly the entire episode. The first was in "Patrick SmartPants."
- This is the third episode that has Squidward's full first name on the title card instead of "Squid." The first was "Squidward the Unfriendly Ghost," and the second was "Squidward in Clarinetland."
- This is the third title card to be on the chalkboard. The first time was "New Student Starfish," the second time was "Professor Squidward," and the fourth time will be "Teacher's Pests." All four episodes involve school and education.
- This is the fifth time in the series SpongeBob sings with a voice that is not his, the first time was in "Ripped Pants," the second time was in "Pizza Delivery," the third time was in "Band Geeks," and the fourth time was in The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie.
- In "Home Sweet Rubble," in Patrick's Dream office, two of his pictures from this episode can be seen on the walls.
- This episode premiered three years after "A Life in a Day" premiered and two years after "Squid's Visit" premiered.
- This episode premiered in Canada 12 years after the premiere of "Texas" and "Walking Small," ten years after the premiere of "The Algae's Always Greener" and "SpongeGuard on Duty," and two years after "A Day Without Tears" premiered.
- When SpongeBob smudged the painting, he blurred the "mildly nude" parts. The painting was also a parody of a famous painting called The Birth of Venus, but with fish instead of people.
- The plot of this episode is very similar to the My Gym Partner's a Monkey episode "Nice Mustache," since both involve a main character gaining facial hair, causing them to change their behavior, only for the facial hair to turn out to be a fuzzy animal by the end of the episode.
- When Squidward and Patrick were walking to the concert, Squidward was wearing his brown shirt and a bow tie, but when the scene changed, Squidward was wearing a tuxedo.
- They could have gone back home and changed which would also explain why Patrick was wearing a top hat and had his cane when the scene changed, he did not in the previous scene.
- How the sea urchin did not wake up before Patrick started crying is unknown.
- In the opening shot of the inside of The Famed Bikini Bottom Opera House, the Skywriter is shown, but when the shot is shown later, he is replaced by Frankie Billy. When it is shown for the third time, it is the Skywriter again.