This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants Social Media short "SpongeBob Checks His Instaclam," which aired on April 29, 2014.

  • Narrator: And now, SpongeBob checks his Instaclam.
  • [SpongeBob holds up his tablet and looks at it.]
  • SpongeBob: What wonders await me today?
  • [SpongeBob tilts the screen sideways then laughs at a photo of Patrick tied in a telephone cord posted on Instaclam.]
  • [SpongeBob scrolls down to a photo of Gary in his underwear.]
  • SpongeBob: Ummmmmmmmm. Hmmmmmmmmmm.
  • [SpongeBob presses the like button]
  • [SpongeBob scrolls down to a photo of Pearl with make up attempting to kiss.]
  • SpongeBob: It's beautiful!
  • [SpongeBob presses the like button. Then he presses the Shell button which brings up the camera. He proceeds to take a picture of a Krabby Patty by pressing the Shell button at the bottom then the arrow to upload it.]
  • SpongeBob: Man, oh man do I love my job!
  • [The saving button loads and then moves onto the other photos taken by SpongeBob which appear to also be Krabby Patties. He presses the shell button at the top to take him to uploads by SpongeBob. A GIF photo is shown of SpongeBob pulling his pants back a bit to show a tattoo of Kenny the Cat face with the text "My Good Side."]
  • SpongeBob: Check it out! I guess it's plain to see who the true Kenny the Cat fan is!
  • [SpongeBob scrolls down to a GIF of a scene from the episode "Squid Baby" where SpongeBob is playing with a whistle and hammer and Patrick is poking his head through plastic rings of different sizes. Squidward pops up in the corner saying dislike after pressing the dislike button.]
  • SpongeBob: Good one Squidward!
  • [SpongeBob posts a reply saying "Love Ya!!!" while laughing. It comes up as a bubble. He them scrolls down further to find Small Fry Fridays with a picture and a clip shown.]
  • SpongeBob: Goo Goo. Ga Ga!
  • [SpongeBob opens up the left one to reveal Mr. Krabs when he was a baby as seen in "Friend or Foe." Then slides to the next one which is a clip from "Truth or Square" when SpongeBob was inside Margaret eating his first Krabby Patty at the Krusty Krab.]
  • SpongeBob: Awe, I remember my first visit to The Krusty Krab.
  • [The clip plays. SpongeBob looks out Margaret's belly button and sees the Galley Grub.]
  • SpongeBob: Krabby Patty! [The scene changes to show Margaret and Harold sitting at a table eating Krabby Patties. In the womb, SpongeBob is eating the Krabby Patties through the umbilical cord.] Yummy! [He takes the cord, rips it out, and sucks on the cord.]
  • [The clip ends and an advertisement pops up for the Chum Bucket.]
  • Female voice: Come on down to the Chum Bucket for Chum Burgers, Cream Danish and...
  • SpongeBob: No! Nononono! [SpongeBob exits the advertisement.]
  • [A photo of Sandy with lots and lots of acorns stuffed in her mouth comes up.]
  • SpongeBob: Wow pretty good!
  • [He presses the like button and scrolls down to a photo from "Something Smells" where he eats his "Special Sundae."]
  • SpongeBob: Deliciousness!
  • [SpongeBob presses the like button then scrolls down to see a video of Gary. He is drawn in 8 bit form and has rainbow flowers coming from behind while moving in a blue background. A spoof of Nyan Cat]
  • Gary: Meow!
  • SpongeBob: Fascinating. He has a sensationality!
  • Gary: Meow!
  • SpongebBob: Oh that's nice!
  • Gary: Meow!
  • SpongeBob: Time to wrap it up!
  • [The scene fades into a picture of Baby SpongeBob before he was born with the title "Catch More On Nick!"]
  • SpongeBob: Goo, Goo! Ga, Ga!
  • [The short ends.]

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