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Scooter: The roof!(lava and fire is burning down the Krusty Krab,and everyone runs around screaming)
 
Scooter: The roof!(lava and fire is burning down the Krusty Krab,and everyone runs around screaming)
   
Mr. Krabs: Eh, ya lemons. Afraid of a little lavar?(lava splashes on cash register) CASHY!(sobs) Noo! Please, make it stop raining lava!
+
Mr. Krabs: Eh, ya lemons. Afraid of a little lavar?(lava splashes on cash register) CASHY! Noo! Make it stop raining fire of destruction! (sobs0
   
SpongeBob: Excuse me, Mr. Krabs, but shouldn't we go somewhere that at least doesn't have lava coming through it? (everyone evacuates) Well, I think there's shelter...
+
SpongeBob: Sorry to interupt your crying, Mr. Krabs, but shouldn't we get to a place that at least doesn't have a roof with lava coming through it? (everyone evacuates) Fear not, shelter can be found--
   
Mr. Krabs: Oh, what's the point? Don't you see? The civilization we know is crumbling to dust! (a hideous close-up is shown) The state regulations are not met. I need your lives! (grabs SpongeBob and Squidward)
+
Mr. Krabs: Oh, why even bother, Spongebob? Can't you see? The civilization we know is crumbling to dust! (a hideous close-up is shown) Civilic orders is in tatters. It's every man for himself, there's no other way. I'm gonna need your life accence! (grabs SpongeBob and Squidward)
   
Old Woman: (to Mr. Krabs) Hey, what are you doing still out? Plenty of room at the Volcano Shelter! I don't want anymore roughhousing, you got that?!
+
Old Woman: (to Mr. Krabs) What are you boys doing out still? Plenty of room at the Volcano Shelter! Hypen no more roughhousing, you got that?!
   
Mr. Krabs: (lets go) Uh, yes, Grandma! (to SpongeBob and Squidward) You need to behave yourselves, boys!
+
Mr. Krabs: (lets go) Oh, yes. Of course, ma'am. (to SpongeBob and Squidward) Try and behave yourselves, fellas.
   
 
(cut to the Volcano Shelter)
 
(cut to the Volcano Shelter)

Revision as of 03:07, 5 August 2012

This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Sponge-Cano!" from season 7, which aired on January 28, 2011. (Squidward is about to paint)

Squidward: (hears SpongeBob outside) Is that supposed to be singing? (paint brushes fall on the floor) I'm putting this one on SpongeBob. (to SpongeBob)SpongeBob, would you calm up? I'm trying to paint!

SpongeBob:(singing) I cherish my fellow residents...

Squidward: SpongeBob, what are you doing out there?

SpongeBob: I'm expressing to all the sea an attitude of gratitude!

Squidward: Gratitude? What could you possibly be gratful, for?

SpongeBob: Hit it, boys! (Slimy Trashcan Monsters appear)(singing) Oh, I’ve got an whole new, attitude, A life-time subscription to, gratitude, Friend you’ve got to change your, platitude, Live an attitude of, gratitude, I’m grateful for the life I am living, Who knows how long I will have it, I’m thankful for all I’ve been given, We make appreciation a habit, There’s no time like the present day, To have a present come your way,(All you have to do it grab it), So now I think that you will see (you’ll see), There’s nothing more you need,My friend this ain’t no, platitude (platitude), Just an attitude of, gratitude (gratitude), Or in your case, Squidward,An attitude of hattitude! (laughs)

Squidward: Keep you and your gratitude to yourself! Because having you as a neighbor has left me with nothing to be grateful for! (slips on the paint brushes and falls downstairs, bursting a pipe)

SpongeBob: Boy, Squidward, looks like you need your pumping checked.

Squidward: This is all your fault, SpongeBob!

SpongeBob: May I help you out?

Squidward: No, SpongeBob. Don't help me EVER!

SpongeBob: Okay, see ya later. (walks away)

Squidward: Moron. (uses his wrench to tighten the pipe, and tightens it up too much) Stupid pipe! (looks at watch) Oh, great. I'm late for work, again!

(Bubble transition to The Krusty Krab)

(Squidward walks inside really fast)

Scooter: Whoa! Slow down there, Speedster! (laughs)

Squidward: Why don't you go jump in a coral bit.

Mr. Krabs: Squidward, I told you, the customers' jokes are always funny! Now, give the lad a chuckle!

Squidward:Ha ha ha.

Scooter:Thanks, I knew you would soon get it.

(SpongeBob is looking at Squidward)

Squidward: Stop staring, SpongeBob.

Sandals: One Krabby Patty, please.

Squidward: That'll be 3 dollars.

Sandals: (with many pennies) Do you accept pennies?

Squidward: I don't have time to count all that!

Sandals:Fine, I'll just take my loose change, ELSEWHERE!

Squidward: Well, someone wants to waste my time.(Fred is tapping his feet)Excuse me, how am I supposed to concentrate with all of that noisy tapping. And YOU! What do you think you're doing?

Nat: I'm holding the door for the nice lady!

Squidward: No, you're not. You're leaving your finger prints all over the glass! And now your truely is gonna have to clean it up! Why must everyone make my job so difficult?! (to Dale) You leave your trash on the table! (to Mabel) Your teeth chatter! (to orange fish with a hat) Your hat annoys me! (to blue fish) You take too long in the restroom! (to SpongeBob) And SpongeBob, would you quit singing that song?

SpongeBob:Why, Squidward. Don't you have an attitude of gratitude?

Squidward: I hate my job, I live in a city of neighbors I don't like. I the most miserable person in Bikini Bottom!

SpongeBob: Don't worry, Squidward. It could be worse.

Squidward: How could life in Bikini Bottom POSSIBLY get any worse?

(a volcano erupts)

Nat: Mount Bikini Bottom is erupting!

SpongeBob: That's how.

Lloyd: Ooh.

Scooter: The roof!(lava and fire is burning down the Krusty Krab,and everyone runs around screaming)

Mr. Krabs: Eh, ya lemons. Afraid of a little lavar?(lava splashes on cash register) CASHY! Noo! Make it stop raining fire of destruction! (sobs0

SpongeBob: Sorry to interupt your crying, Mr. Krabs, but shouldn't we get to a place that at least doesn't have a roof with lava coming through it? (everyone evacuates) Fear not, shelter can be found--

Mr. Krabs: Oh, why even bother, Spongebob? Can't you see? The civilization we know is crumbling to dust! (a hideous close-up is shown) Civilic orders is in tatters. It's every man for himself, there's no other way. I'm gonna need your life accence! (grabs SpongeBob and Squidward)

Old Woman: (to Mr. Krabs) What are you boys doing out still? Plenty of room at the Volcano Shelter! Hypen no more roughhousing, you got that?!

Mr. Krabs: (lets go) Oh, yes. Of course, ma'am. (to SpongeBob and Squidward) Try and behave yourselves, fellas.

(cut to the Volcano Shelter)

Mayor: Calm down everyone. We need a solution.

Billy: Oh, what do we do?

Mayor: No need to be alarmed. We've got everything under control.

Billy: (jerks on the mayor) Under control? Half the city is on fire! You call THAT under control? (the police take him away) The end is of the world is near!

Harold: I think he's on to something. Are you hiding something? What's the secret. Is it really the end?

SpongeBob: I've got something to say.

Mayor: Do you know how to stop the volcano?

SpongeBob: (takes out parking tickets) Actually, I was about to ask about these parking tickets. I don't have a boating license.

Squidward: Idiot.

Mayor: WE'RE DOOMED!

(a shadow appears in the doorway)

Dolphin Warrior: (laughs) You fools!

Mayor: Who are you?

Dolphin Warrior: I'm an ancient warrior from long ago. I'm the last of my kind that ruled before the dawn of time. But, a las, my people were wiped out by the same volcano that troubles you now.

Harold: How did you survive?

Dolphin Warrior: (laughs) I survived, because I was the only one that knew how to stop it!

Harold: Well, don't keep us in suspense. How do you stop the volcano?

Dolphin Warrior: You must make... A SACRIFICE!

(everyone gasps)

Harold: What kind of sacrifice?

Dolphin Warrior: The sacrifice must be made of the most miserable person.

Harold: That's it! We must sacrifice the most miserable person in town!

Monica: But, who is the most miserable person?

Harold: Well, it certainly isn't me! (everyone argues)

SpongeBob: Squidward, who do you think is the most miserable person in Bikini Bottom?

Squidward: Don't know, don't care. (walks away)

SpongeBob: But, Squidward, is very imperative...

Squidward: (imitating SpongeBob) But, Squidward, it is imperative that we... (regular voice) NOTHING! I'd rather take my chances with the volcano than continue living with you and the citizens of Dumb-Dumb Town! (everyone is angry at Squidward) What? (scence cuts to everyone carrying Squidward to the volcano) What do you think you're doing? You've got the wrong guy!

Fish 1: We heard you complain about the fingerprints.

Fish 2: And the foot-tapping.

Sandals: And my loose change.

Mabel: And my teeth (points to fish with hat) and his hat.

Scooter: And you called your pipe stupid.

Lloyd: And the fact that you said you were the most miserable person in Bikini Bottom! (plays tape recorder)

Squidward: (on the tape recorder) I'm the most miserable person in Bikini Bottom! (grumbles) Put me down!

Mayor: Sorry, Mr. Tentacles. Throw him in.

Squidward: NOOOOOO!!!!

SpongeBob: WAIT! It was I who made Squidward miserable. Throw ME in instead.

Mayor: Works for me!

(everyone puts Squidward down)

Squidward: Thank you for coming to your senses. Okay, SpongeBob. Jump in. (Squidward slips and hangs onto the ledge)

SpongeBob: Squidward!

Squidward: Ahhh! SpongeBob, HELP!

SpongeBob: But, you said not to help you ever again! And you said that living next to you has left you with nothing to be grateful for. I made a promise!

Squidward: I take it back! I didn't mean any of that! I appreciate you rfriendship. I'm... (cries) I'm grateful for the life I'm living! Who knows how long I'll have it? I learned that from you, remember? Bye, everyone! (the cliff crumbles and Squidward falls and screams)

SpongeBob: (grabs him) I knew you felt that way all along. (pulls him up)

(the pipe at Squidward's house bursts causing it to fall into the volcano) (everyone except Squidward cheers)

Squidward: MY HOUSE!

Dolphin Warrior: The sacrifice has been apeased!

Squidward: But, you said that the sacrifice had to be made of the most miserable person.

Dolphim Warrior: (chuckles) No! You didn't let me finish. I was trying to say, a sacrifice of the most miserable person's HOUSE. No one ever listens to me. (laughs as he flies away on his scepter)

Squidward: You know, SpongeBob. In light of everything that's happened... I lied to you. I'm not grateful for anything! I mean look at me. I don't even have a roof to sleep under, anymore!

SpongeBob: I wouldn't say that. (bubble transition to SpongeBob going to bed with Squidward)

Squidward: Go away. (turns out lights)