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{{EpisodeTr/105b}}
{{BTranscript
 
 
{{L|Squidward|''[Wakes up, jumps into the shower, and starts to brush himself when he starts hearing a slide whistling noise every time he moves the brush]'' Huh? What's that? Hmm, must be hearing things.}}
|prev = The Splinter
 
 
{{L|''[Goes outside and breathes in]''}}
|title = Slide Whistle Stooges
 
 
{{L|Squidward|Ahhhh... smell that fresh morning sea! ''[Singing to himself]''♪La da dum dum dee.♪}}
|next = A Life in a Day
 
 
{{L|''[Bends down to pick up the newspaper and hears the slide whistling noise. The same happens when he stands back up]''}}
|titlecard = NVE00002.png
 
  +
{{L|Squidward|Huh? Must be hearing things... Again!}}
|season = 6
 
 
{{L|''[Slide whistling noises happen when he shakes the bag and when the newspaper slides out]''}}
|episode = 105b
 
  +
{{L|Squidward|''[Breathes out. hears the slide whistle]'' What is that noise?!}}
|airdate = [[February 16]], [[2009]]
 
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick are heard laughing]''}}
|seasonname = six
 
 
{{L|Squidward|Ahhhh.... I should have guessed. It's too early for this.}}
}}
 
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick are heard laughing again]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' [Wakes up, jumps into the shower, and starts to brush himself when he starts hearing a slide whistling noise every time he moves the brush] Huh? What's that? Hmm, must be hearing things.
 
  +
{{L|Squidward|Alright you two! ''[SpongeBob and Patrick are seen as lumps under Squidward's front mat. He stomps on the lumps]'' What is the meaning of this?!}}
*[Go's outside and breathes in]
 
 
{{L|''[Squidward lifts up the mat]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' Ahhhh... smell that fresh morning sea! [Singing to himself] La da dum dum dee.
 
 
{{L|SpongeBob|What is the meaning of this?! ''[SpongeBob and Patrick laugh. They stand up with the slide whistle effect]'' We're slide whistling!}}
*[Bends down to pick up the newspaper and hears the slide whistling noise. The same happens when he stands back up.]
 
*'''Squidward:''' Huh? Must be hearing things... Again!
+
{{L|Squidward|Don't you mean, "Playing the slide whistle?"}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Squidward, slide whistling is more than just simply tooting on an instrument! It's a way of life! Let's show him Patrick.}}
*[Slide whistling noises happen when he shakes the bag and when the newspaper slides out.]
 
*'''Squidward:''' [Breathes out] [hears the slide whistle] What is that noise!?
+
{{L|''[Squidward's door opens with the slide whistling effect. SpongeBob and Patrick run inside]''}}
*[SpongeBob and Patrick are heard laughing]
+
{{L|Squidward|Hey! Get out of here! Huh? ''[Squidward looks around and doesn't see them. SpongeBob and Patrick are heard laughing]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Alright you two morons! Show yourselves!}}
*'''Squidward:''' Ahhhh.... I should have guessed. It's too early for this.
 
 
{{L|''[They slide out from the dining room light with the slide whistle effect]''}}
*[SpongeBob and Patrick are heard laughing again]
 
*'''Squidward:''' Alright you two! [SpongeBob and Patrick are seen as lumps under Squidward's front mat] [He stomps on the lumps] What is the meaning of this!?
+
{{L|SpongeBob|You see Squidward! Slide whistling can add a little zest to the humdrum of everyday life.}}
 
{{L|Squidward|I don't need zest! I need you out of my lampshade! ''[Squidward jumps onto the table to get them out but they're not there. SpongeBob appears with the slide whistle effect behind a plant]''}}
*[Squidward lifts up the mat]
 
 
{{L|Squidward|Get out of there!!!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' What is the meaning of this!? [SpongeBob and Patrick laugh] [They stand up with the slide whistle effect] We're slide whistling!
 
*'''Squidward:''' Don't you mean, "Playing the slide whistle?"
+
{{L|''[SpongeBob floats through the air with the slide whistle noise and out the door]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Grrrrr... ''[SpongeBob and Patrick are spinning around the circular windows]'' Just get out of there!!! ''[They land onto Squidward's paintings. as the shape of Squidward's head]'' Okay, that's enough! You've had your fun.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Squidward, slide whistling is more than just simply tooting on an instrument! It's a way of life! Let's show him Patrick.
 
 
{{L|SpongeBob|True Squidward, True. We have had our fun. But you know what's twice as much fun?! ''[Pops out of the painting]'' twice as many slide whistles!!! After you my good man. ''[hands Patrick a slide whistle]''}}
*[Squidward's door opens with the slide whistling effect. SpongeBob and Patrick run inside.]
 
 
{{L|Patrick|Thanks buddy! ''[Patrick floats out of the painting and across the room. SpongeBob follows. They start to head toward the windows]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' Hey! Get out of here! Huh? [Squidward looks around and doesn't see them]
 
 
{{L|Squidward|Not the windows again! ''[Runs to the window and opens it]'' Gotcha! They're gone. Whew! Now if they'd just stay out of my house, I might be able to enjoy a little squid time.}}
*[SpongeBob and Patrick are heard laughing]
 
  +
{{L|''[Squidward makes himself a pot of tea.. The slide whistle effect happens when he pours the tea into the cup.. SpongeBob and Patrick laugh. Squidward closes the blinds and then sits down to drink his tea. The slide whistle effect is also here.. SpongeBob and Patrick laugh outside.. SpongeBob and Patrick continue this when Squidward is making his bed, when he brushes his teeth, cleans the toilet, and reads]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' Alright you two morons! Show yourselves!
 
 
{{L|Squidward|''[getting angry, about to explode]'' I gotta get out of here!!!}}
*[They slide out from the dining room light with the slide whistle effect.]
 
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick are laughing when Squidward walks through the door, shattering it]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' You see Squidward! Slide whistling can add a little zest to the humdrum of everyday life.
 
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Look Patrick! Squidward is finally playing along.}}
*'''Squidward:''' I don't need zest! I need you out of my lampshade! [Squidward jumps onto the table to get them out but they're not there]
 
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick follow Squidward while he is running away from them. They, of course, have their slide whistles]''}}
*[SpongeBob appears with the slide whistle effect behind a plant.]
 
  +
{{L|Squidward|Go away!!! Can't you idiots take a hint?! ''[Squidward keeps running. Squidward runs into Goo Lagoon with SpongeBob and Patrick following him.. SpongeBob and Patrick are shown as mermen underwater, SpongeBob and Patrick have their slide whistles and are playing along with Squidward's movements.. Squidward swims into a cave and starts running. He breaks through the back of the cave and stops to catch his breath]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' Get out of there!!!
 
 
{{L|Squidward|I think I lost 'em. ''[SpongeBob and Patrick are there whistling every time Squidward takes a breath.. Squidward takes SpongeBob's slide whistle]''}}
*[SpongeBob floats through the air with the slide whistle noise and out the door]
 
 
{{L|Squidward|How would you like it if someone did THIS to you?! ''[Squidward starts playing through a fit of rage]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' Grrrrr... [SpongeBob and Patrick are spinning around the circular windows] Just get out of there!!! [They land onto Squidward's paintings. as the shape of Squidward's head.] Okay, that's enough! You've had your fun.
 
  +
{{L|SpongeBob|Alright! ''[SpongeBob and Patrick dance along to Squidward's whistling.. SpongeBob and Patrick are floating around and dancing for a while when Squidward puts down the slide whistle and gives up, so we think]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' True Squidward, True. We have had our fun. But you know what's twice as much fun?! [Pops out of the painting] twice as many slide whistles!!! After you my good man. [hands Patrick a slide whistle.]
 
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Wow, Squidward! You have got quite an ear for music!}}
*'''Patrick:''' Thanks buddy! [Patrick floats out of the painting and across the room. SpongeBob follows] [They start to head toward the windows]
 
 
{{L|Squidward|''[yelling]'' Don't you... I do?}}
*'''Squidward:''' Not the windows again! [Runs to the window and opens it.] Gotcha! They're gone. Whew! Now if they'd just stay out of my house, I might be able to enjoy a little squid time.
 
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Yes my friend. You got... the goods!}}
*[Squidward makes himself a pot of tea.]
 
 
{{L|Squidward|Well, uh...ha... that is true...}}
*[The slide whistle effect happens when he pours the tea into the cup.]
 
*[SpongeBob and Patrick laugh]
+
{{L|SpongeBob|Come, play some more maestro. Me and Patrick want to sing to your saweeet tunes!}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Well... If you insist...}}
*[Squidward closes the blinds and then sits down to drink his tea. The slide whistle effect is also here.]
 
*[SpongeBob and Patrick laugh outside.]
+
{{L|SpongeBob|Oh! We insist!}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Okay!!!}}
*[SpongeBob and Patrick continue this when Squidward is making his bed, when he brushes his teeth, cleans the toilet, and reads.]
 
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob, Patrick and Squidward all start slide whistling.. Scene cuts to the Barg'n-Mart. The door opens]''}}
*'''Squidward: '''[getting angry, about to explode] I gotta get out of here!!!
 
 
{{L|Dennis|''[looks up]'' Hello?}}
*[SpongeBob and Patrick are laughing when Squidward walks through the door, shattering it.]
 
 
{{L|''[Door closes with the slide whistle effect]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Look Patrick! Squidward is finally playing along.
 
 
{{L|Dennis|Well that's unusual. ''[Keeps reading. Slide whistle effect happens when he turns the pages]''}}
*[SpongeBob and Patrick follow Squidward while he is running away from them. They, of course, have their slide whistles.]
 
 
{{L|Dennis|''[angrily]'' What is that?! Who's there?! ''[Squidward behind the cashiers desk, laughs]'' Who's back here?!}}
*'''Squidward:''' Go away!!! Can't you idiots take a hit!? [Squidward keeps running]
 
 
{{L|''[Doors close with the slide whistle effect.. Dennis looks behind him.. He hears the doors again]''}}
*[Squidward runs into Goo Lagoon with SpongeBob and Patrick following him.]
 
*[SpongeBob and Patrick are shown as mermen underwater, SpongeBob and Patrick have their slide whistles and are playing along with Squidward's movements.]
+
{{L|Dennis|''[Runs out of the store]'' Alright! This isn't funny! Come on jerk! You think you can mess with me?! ''[SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward laugh.. Scene cuts to the streets of Bikini Bottom. SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward march with slide whistles playing in a chorus]''}}
 
{{L|Squidward|Watch this! ''[Shows Sally pushing a baby carriage. Squidward plays a note on the slide whistle from inside the carriage.. Sally looks down]''}}
*[Squidward swims into a cave and starts running. He breaks through the back of the cave and stops to catch his breath.]
 
 
{{L|Squidward|Goo goo wa wa goo goo wa goo goo he ha wa... ''[Jumps out of the carriage]'' ha ha ha!}}
*'''Squidward:''' I think I lost 'em. [SpongeBob and Patrick are there whistling every time Squidward takes a breath.]
 
 
{{L|Sally|Ahhhh!!! Someone help! Baby assaulter!}}
*[Squidward takes SpongeBob's slide whistle.]
 
 
{{L|''[Squidward in a crowd of people floats up with the slide whistle effect]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' How would you like it if someone did this to you!? [Squidward starts playing through a fit of rage]
 
 
{{L|All|''[yelling at him]'' phrases heard amidst the crowd: Go assault your own baby "Hey! Get back here!", etc.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Alright! [SpongeBob and Patrick dance along to Squidward's whistling.]
 
*[SpongeBob and Patrick are floating around and dancing for a while when Squidward puts down the slide whistle and gives up, so we think.]
+
{{L|Squidward|''[Laughs while in midair]'' If you say so. ''[Floats down with the slide whistle effect and into a manhole]''}}
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, are you thinking what I'm thinking?}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Wow Squidward! You have got quite an ear for music!
 
 
{{L|''[Shows Patrick with a thought cloud digging out bellybutton lint]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' [yelling] Why don't you... I do?
 
 
{{L|Patrick|Probably not.}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Yes my friend. You got... the goods!
 
 
{{L|''[Squidward goes up through a streetlight and hears a couple]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' Well, uh...ha... that is true...
 
 
{{L|Nancy|Oh honey, I'm so sorry. I promise it'll never happen again. ''[Nancy and Frank hug.. Squidward plays the slide whistle.. Frank gets up. Lenny walks along]''}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Come, play some more maestro. Me and Patrick want to sing to your saweeet tunes!
 
 
{{L|Lenny|Can I help you... ''[Frank punches Lenny in the face]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' Well... If you insist...
 
 
{{L|Frank|Liar!!!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Oh! We insist!
 
 
{{L|Fish|She's not lying. ''[angry mob appears with torches and pitchforks]'' She speaks the truth. Someone wicked has disturbed our peaceful city, Frank. ''[captions version Man: She's not lying, she speaks the truth, someone wicked has disturbed our peaceful city, Frank]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' Okay!!!
 
 
{{L|Frank|But who would do such a thing?}}
*[SpongeBob, Patrick and Squidward all start slide whistling.]
 
 
{{L|Fish|Squidward! Squidward Tentacles! He lives on Conch Drive!}}
*[Scene cuts to the Barg'n-Mart]
 
 
{{L|Frank|What?}}
*[The door opens]
 
 
{{L|Fish|Yes, we must capture him. He must pay for his wrong doings!}}
*'''Dennis:''' [looks up] Hello?
 
 
{{L|Angry Mob|He's going to pay! He's going to pay with interest! He's going down!}}
*[Door closes with the slide whistle effect.]
 
 
{{L|''[Squidward slide whistles by]''}}
*'''Dennis:''' Well that's unusual. [Keeps reading]
 
 
{{L|Another Fish|Come on, let's get him!}}
*[Slide whistle effect happens when he turns the pages.]
 
 
{{L|''[Angry mob runs after Squidward]''}}
*'''Dennis:''' [angrily] What is that!? Who's there!? [Squidward behind the cashiers desk, laughs.] Who's back here!?
 
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Patrick, do you think Squidward is taking this a little too far?}}
*[Doors close with the slide whistle effect.]
 
 
{{L|Patrick|He's only a block away. ''[crowd yelling. Policemen see the angry mob]''}}
*[Dennis looks behind him.]
 
 
{{L|Police officer|What do you make of it, Sarg?}}
*[He hears the doors again.]
 
 
{{L|Sergeant|It looks like a full scale riot. I'm calling for backup. ''[On his radio]'' Get me the K-9 unit!}}
*'''Dennis:''' [Runs out of the store.] Alright, this isn't funny! Come on jerk, you think you can mess with me!? [SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward laugh.]
 
 
{{L|''[The riot looks up and sees Squidward on top of a building with the slide whistle.. captions version Looks like a full scale of riot, I'm calling for backup, get me the K-9 unit. ''[crowd yelling. Squidward laughs. all talking at once. The cops show up and then the K-9 unit]''}}
*[Scene cuts to the streets of Bikini Bottom]
 
 
{{L|Squidward|Would you like some more?! ''[Squidward makes a high-pitched noise on the slide whistle]''}}
*[SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward march with slide whistles playing in a chorus.]
 
 
{{L|K-9 Handler|''[The worms begin turning rabid]'' Wait! Wait, you stupid worms! ''[The worms start to attack him]'' Ahhhhh!!! I was supposed to retire this week!!!}}
*'''Squidward:''' Watch this! [Shows Sally pushing a baby carriage]
 
 
{{L|Squidward|Let's give them a grand finale they'll never forget!}}
*[Squidward plays a note on the slide whistle from inside the carriage.]
 
 
{{L|''[Squidward slide whistles his way into the back of a semi truck pulling a gas tanker.. The driver shifts gears and the slide whistle noise happens. The driver starts to drink some coffee and the slide whistle noise happens. ]''}}
*[Sally looks down.]
 
 
{{L|Driver|Huh? What is that?!}}
*'''Squidward:''' Goo goo wa wa goo goo wa goo goo he ha wa... [Jumps out of the carriage] ha ha ha!
 
 
{{L|''[Squidward silently laughs to himself. The driver turns the steering wheel and the slide whistling noise happens]''}}
*'''Sally:''' Ahhhh!!! Someone help! Baby assaulter!
 
 
{{L|Driver|I can't work under these conditions! ''[The driver puts on a helmet and jumps from the truck and rolls.. Squidward sits in the drivers sit]''}}
*[Squidward in a crowd of people floats up with the slide whistle effect.]
 
 
{{L|Squidward|Now you're in the driver's seat Squiddy! Squidward does the slide whistle noises and isn't paying attention to the road at all.. subtitles read All: AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! . Squidward accelerates and drives through the chum bucket]''}}
*'''All:''' [yelling at him] phrases heard amidst the crowd: "Go assault your own baby" "Hey! Get back here!", etc.
 
 
{{L|Mr. Krabs|''[laughs]'' Well, Plankton finally got what he deserved. ''[subtitles version Mr. Krabs: Well, Plankton finally got what he deserved. Then Squidward drives through the Krusty Krab.. Mr. Krabs starts crying]''}}
*'''Squidward:''' [Laughs while in midair] If you say so. [Floats down with the slide whistle effect and into a manhole.]
 
 
{{L|Squidward|''[headed toward a ramp and through a ring of fire]'' I've never felt so alive! ''[Clears the jump]'' I don't wanna stop!}}
*'''SpongeBob:''' Patrick, are you thinking what I'm thinking?
 
 
{{L|''[SpongeBob and Patrick pull up in a car]''}}
*[Shows Patrick with a thought cloud digging out bellybutton lint.]
 
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Squidward, are you sure you don't wanna stop?}}
*'''Patrick:''' Probably not.
 
 
{{L|Squidward|What are you talking about nitwit?!}}
*[Squidward goes up through a streetlight and hears a couple.]
 
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Up ahead!!!}}
*'''Nancy:''' Oh honey, I'm so sorry. I promise it'll never happen again. [Nancy and Frank hug.]
 
  +
{{L|Squidward|What up ahead?! ''[Squidward sees a cliff.. As he goes over the edge, he plays the slide whistle from high to low.. The tanker crashes.. Pause. Everyone but SpongeBob and Patrick cheer happily about Squidward's death.. SpongeBob and Patrick play a funeral march on the slide whistle.. Scene cuts to the Bikini Bottom Hospital]''}}
*[Squidward plays the slide whistle.]
 
 
{{L|Doctor Gill Gilliam|Your friend is very lucky. If it wasn't for that slide whistle getting lodged in his throat, the rescue team might have never found him. ''[The slide whistle starts going crazy in Squidward’s throat]''}}
*[Frank gets up]
 
 
{{L|Doctor Gill Gilliam|His yelling, or whistling I should say, under all that rubble saved his life.}}
*[Lenny walks along]
 
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Doctor, why did you leave the whistle in his throat?}}
*'''Lenny:''' Can I help you... [Frank punches Lenny in the face.]
 
 
{{L|Doctor Gill Gilliam|Unfortunately, we don't have the technology to remove it yet. But on the bright side, he can still communicate with us.}}
*'''Frank:''' Liar!!!
 
 
{{L|''[The slide whistle starts going crazy again. Squidward is actually moving the slide whistle in a fit of anger, attempting to scream at SpongeBob and Patrick]''}}
*'''Fish:''' She's not lying. [angry mob appears with torches and pitchforks.] She speaks the truth. Someone wicked has disturbed our peaceful city Frank. [captions version Man: She's not lying, she speaks the truth, someone wicked has disturbed our peaceful city, Frank.]
 
 
{{L|SpongeBob|Wow Squidward, listen to you! You're getting better already! Here we'll help. ''[SpongeBob and Patrick raise their slide whistles.. SpongeBob and Patrick go around the hospital playing the slide whistle to CPR, a guy on a ventilator, and Gill Gilliam stitching Nat up]''}}
*'''Frank:''' But who would do such a thing?
 
*'''Fish:''' Squidward! Squidward Tentacles! He lives on Conch Drive!
 
*'''Frank:''' What?
 
*'''Fish:''' Yes, we must capture him. He must pay for his wrong doings!
 
*'''Angry Mob:''' He's going to pay! He's going to pay with interest! He's going down!
 
*[Squidward slide whistles by.]
 
*'''Another Fish:''' Come on, let's get him!
 
*[Angry mob runs after Squidward]
 
*'''SpongeBob:''' Patrick, do you think Squidward is taking this a little too far?
 
*'''Patrick:''' He's only a block away. [crowd yelling]
 
*[Policemen see the angry mob.]
 
*'''Police officer:''' What do you make of it Sarg?
 
*'''Sergeant:''' It looks like a full scale riot. I'm calling for backup! [On his radio] Get me the K-9 unit!
 
*[The riot looks up and sees Squidward on top of a building with the slide whistle.] [captions version Looks like a full scale of riot, I'm calling for backup, get me the K-9 unit. [crowd yelling]
 
*[Squidward laughs] [all talking at once]
 
*[The cops show up and then the K-9 unit]
 
*'''Squidward:''' Would you like some more!? [Squidward makes a high-pitched noise on the slide whistle.]
 
*'''K-9 Handler:''' [The worms begin turning rabid] Wait! Wait you stupid worms! [The worms start to attack him] Ahhhhh!!! I was supposed to retire this week!!!
 
*'''Squidward:''' Let's give them a grand finale they'll never forget!
 
*[Squidward slide whistles his way into the back of a semi truck pulling a gas tanker.]
 
*[The driver shifts gears and the slide whistle noise happens. The driver starts to drink some coffee and the slide whistle noise happens. ]
 
*'''Driver:''' Huh? What is that!?
 
*[Squidward silently laughs to himself]
 
*[The driver turns the steering wheel and the slide whistling noise happens.]
 
*'''Driver:''' I can't work under these conditions! [The driver puts on a helmet and jumps from the truck and rolls.]
 
*[Squidward sits in the drivers sit]
 
*'''Squidward:''' Now you're in the driver's seat Squiddy! Squidward does the slide whistle noises and isn't paying attention to the road at all.] [subtitles read All: AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! ]
 
*[Squidward accelerates and drives through the chum bucket.]
 
*'''Mr. Krabs:''' [laughs] Well, Plankton finally got what he deserved. [subtitles version Mr. Krabs: Well, Plankton finally got what he deserved]
 
*[Then Squidward drives through the Krusty Krab.]
 
*[Mr. Krabs starts crying]
 
*'''Squidward:''' [headed toward a ramp and through a ring of fire.] I've never felt so alive! [Clears the jump] I don't wanna stop!
 
*[SpongeBob and Patrick pull up in a car.]
 
*'''SpongeBob:''' Squidward, are you sure you don't wanna stop?
 
*'''Squidward:''' What are you talking about nitwit!?
 
*'''SpongeBob:''' Up ahead!!!
 
*'''Squidward:''' What up ahead!? [Squidward sees a cliff.] [As he goes over the edge, he plays the slide whistle from high to low.]
 
*[The tanker crashes.]
 
*[Pause]
 
*[Everyone but SpongeBob and Patrick cheer happily about Squidward's death.]
 
*[SpongeBob and Patrick play a funeral march on the slide whistle.]
 
*[Scene cuts to the Bikini Bottom Hospital]
 
*'''Doctor Gill Gilliam:''' Your friend is very lucky. If it wasn't for that slide whistle getting lodged in his throat, the rescue team might have never found him. [The slide whistle starts going crazy in Squidward’s throat.]
 
*'''Doctor Gill Gilliam:''' His yelling, or whistling I should say, under all that rubble saved his life.
 
*'''SpongeBob:''' Doctor, why did you leave the whistle in his throat?
 
*'''Doctor Gill Gilliam:''' Unfortunately, we don't have the technology to remove it yet. But on the bright side, he can still communicate with us.
 
*[The slide whistle starts going crazy again. Squidward is actually moving the slide whistle in a fit of anger, attempting to scream at SpongeBob and Patrick.]
 
*'''SpongeBob:''' Wow Squidward, listen to you! You're getting better already! Here we'll help. [SpongeBob and Patrick raise their slide whistles.]
 
*[SpongeBob and Patrick go around the hospital playing the slide whistle to CPR, a guy on a ventilator, and Gill Gilliam stitching Nat up.]
 
[[Category:Episode transcripts]]
 
[[Category:Season 6 transcripts]]
 

Revision as of 13:08, 9 July 2014

Template:EpisodeTr/105b

  • Squidward: [Wakes up, jumps into the shower, and starts to brush himself when he starts hearing a slide whistling noise every time he moves the brush] Huh? What's that? Hmm, must be hearing things.
  • [Goes outside and breathes in]
  • Squidward: Ahhhh... smell that fresh morning sea! [Singing to himself]♪La da dum dum dee.♪
  • [Bends down to pick up the newspaper and hears the slide whistling noise. The same happens when he stands back up]
  • Squidward: Huh? Must be hearing things... Again!
  • [Slide whistling noises happen when he shakes the bag and when the newspaper slides out]
  • Squidward: [Breathes out. hears the slide whistle] What is that noise?!
  • [SpongeBob and Patrick are heard laughing]
  • Squidward: Ahhhh.... I should have guessed. It's too early for this.
  • [SpongeBob and Patrick are heard laughing again]
  • Squidward: Alright you two! [SpongeBob and Patrick are seen as lumps under Squidward's front mat. He stomps on the lumps] What is the meaning of this?!
  • [Squidward lifts up the mat]
  • SpongeBob: What is the meaning of this?! [SpongeBob and Patrick laugh. They stand up with the slide whistle effect] We're slide whistling!
  • Squidward: Don't you mean, "Playing the slide whistle?"
  • SpongeBob: Squidward, slide whistling is more than just simply tooting on an instrument! It's a way of life! Let's show him Patrick.
  • [Squidward's door opens with the slide whistling effect. SpongeBob and Patrick run inside]
  • Squidward: Hey! Get out of here! Huh? [Squidward looks around and doesn't see them. SpongeBob and Patrick are heard laughing]
  • Squidward: Alright you two morons! Show yourselves!
  • [They slide out from the dining room light with the slide whistle effect]
  • SpongeBob: You see Squidward! Slide whistling can add a little zest to the humdrum of everyday life.
  • Squidward: I don't need zest! I need you out of my lampshade! [Squidward jumps onto the table to get them out but they're not there. SpongeBob appears with the slide whistle effect behind a plant]
  • Squidward: Get out of there!!!
  • [SpongeBob floats through the air with the slide whistle noise and out the door]
  • Squidward: Grrrrr... [SpongeBob and Patrick are spinning around the circular windows] Just get out of there!!! [They land onto Squidward's paintings. as the shape of Squidward's head] Okay, that's enough! You've had your fun.
  • SpongeBob: True Squidward, True. We have had our fun. But you know what's twice as much fun?! [Pops out of the painting] twice as many slide whistles!!! After you my good man. [hands Patrick a slide whistle]
  • Patrick: Thanks buddy! [Patrick floats out of the painting and across the room. SpongeBob follows. They start to head toward the windows]
  • Squidward: Not the windows again! [Runs to the window and opens it] Gotcha! They're gone. Whew! Now if they'd just stay out of my house, I might be able to enjoy a little squid time.
  • [Squidward makes himself a pot of tea.. The slide whistle effect happens when he pours the tea into the cup.. SpongeBob and Patrick laugh. Squidward closes the blinds and then sits down to drink his tea. The slide whistle effect is also here.. SpongeBob and Patrick laugh outside.. SpongeBob and Patrick continue this when Squidward is making his bed, when he brushes his teeth, cleans the toilet, and reads]
  • Squidward: [getting angry, about to explode] I gotta get out of here!!!
  • [SpongeBob and Patrick are laughing when Squidward walks through the door, shattering it]
  • SpongeBob: Look Patrick! Squidward is finally playing along.
  • [SpongeBob and Patrick follow Squidward while he is running away from them. They, of course, have their slide whistles]
  • Squidward: Go away!!! Can't you idiots take a hint?! [Squidward keeps running. Squidward runs into Goo Lagoon with SpongeBob and Patrick following him.. SpongeBob and Patrick are shown as mermen underwater, SpongeBob and Patrick have their slide whistles and are playing along with Squidward's movements.. Squidward swims into a cave and starts running. He breaks through the back of the cave and stops to catch his breath]
  • Squidward: I think I lost 'em. [SpongeBob and Patrick are there whistling every time Squidward takes a breath.. Squidward takes SpongeBob's slide whistle]
  • Squidward: How would you like it if someone did THIS to you?! [Squidward starts playing through a fit of rage]
  • SpongeBob: Alright! [SpongeBob and Patrick dance along to Squidward's whistling.. SpongeBob and Patrick are floating around and dancing for a while when Squidward puts down the slide whistle and gives up, so we think]
  • SpongeBob: Wow, Squidward! You have got quite an ear for music!
  • Squidward: [yelling] Don't you... I do?
  • SpongeBob: Yes my friend. You got... the goods!
  • Squidward: Well, uh...ha... that is true...
  • SpongeBob: Come, play some more maestro. Me and Patrick want to sing to your saweeet tunes!
  • Squidward: Well... If you insist...
  • SpongeBob: Oh! We insist!
  • Squidward: Okay!!!
  • [SpongeBob, Patrick and Squidward all start slide whistling.. Scene cuts to the Barg'n-Mart. The door opens]
  • Dennis: [looks up] Hello?
  • [Door closes with the slide whistle effect]
  • Dennis: Well that's unusual. [Keeps reading. Slide whistle effect happens when he turns the pages]
  • Dennis: [angrily] What is that?! Who's there?! [Squidward behind the cashiers desk, laughs] Who's back here?!
  • [Doors close with the slide whistle effect.. Dennis looks behind him.. He hears the doors again]
  • Dennis: [Runs out of the store] Alright! This isn't funny! Come on jerk! You think you can mess with me?! [SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward laugh.. Scene cuts to the streets of Bikini Bottom. SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward march with slide whistles playing in a chorus]
  • Squidward: Watch this! [Shows Sally pushing a baby carriage. Squidward plays a note on the slide whistle from inside the carriage.. Sally looks down]
  • Squidward: Goo goo wa wa goo goo wa goo goo he ha wa... [Jumps out of the carriage] ha ha ha!
  • Sally: Ahhhh!!! Someone help! Baby assaulter!
  • [Squidward in a crowd of people floats up with the slide whistle effect]
  • All: [yelling at him] phrases heard amidst the crowd: Go assault your own baby "Hey! Get back here!", etc.
  • Squidward: [Laughs while in midair] If you say so. [Floats down with the slide whistle effect and into a manhole]
  • SpongeBob: Patrick, are you thinking what I'm thinking?
  • [Shows Patrick with a thought cloud digging out bellybutton lint]
  • Patrick: Probably not.
  • [Squidward goes up through a streetlight and hears a couple]
  • Nancy: Oh honey, I'm so sorry. I promise it'll never happen again. [Nancy and Frank hug.. Squidward plays the slide whistle.. Frank gets up. Lenny walks along]
  • Lenny: Can I help you... [Frank punches Lenny in the face]
  • Frank: Liar!!!
  • Fish: She's not lying. [angry mob appears with torches and pitchforks] She speaks the truth. Someone wicked has disturbed our peaceful city, Frank. [captions version Man: She's not lying, she speaks the truth, someone wicked has disturbed our peaceful city, Frank]
  • Frank: But who would do such a thing?
  • Fish: Squidward! Squidward Tentacles! He lives on Conch Drive!
  • Frank: What?
  • Fish: Yes, we must capture him. He must pay for his wrong doings!
  • Angry Mob: He's going to pay! He's going to pay with interest! He's going down!
  • [Squidward slide whistles by]
  • Another Fish: Come on, let's get him!
  • [Angry mob runs after Squidward]
  • SpongeBob: Patrick, do you think Squidward is taking this a little too far?
  • Patrick: He's only a block away. [crowd yelling. Policemen see the angry mob]
  • Police officer: What do you make of it, Sarg?
  • Sergeant: It looks like a full scale riot. I'm calling for backup. [On his radio] Get me the K-9 unit!
  • [The riot looks up and sees Squidward on top of a building with the slide whistle.. captions version Looks like a full scale of riot, I'm calling for backup, get me the K-9 unit. [crowd yelling. Squidward laughs. all talking at once. The cops show up and then the K-9 unit]
  • Squidward: Would you like some more?! [Squidward makes a high-pitched noise on the slide whistle]
  • K-9 Handler: [The worms begin turning rabid] Wait! Wait, you stupid worms! [The worms start to attack him] Ahhhhh!!! I was supposed to retire this week!!!
  • Squidward: Let's give them a grand finale they'll never forget!
  • [Squidward slide whistles his way into the back of a semi truck pulling a gas tanker.. The driver shifts gears and the slide whistle noise happens. The driver starts to drink some coffee and the slide whistle noise happens. ]
  • Driver: Huh? What is that?!
  • [Squidward silently laughs to himself. The driver turns the steering wheel and the slide whistling noise happens]
  • Driver: I can't work under these conditions! [The driver puts on a helmet and jumps from the truck and rolls.. Squidward sits in the drivers sit]
  • Squidward: Now you're in the driver's seat Squiddy! Squidward does the slide whistle noises and isn't paying attention to the road at all.. subtitles read All: AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! . Squidward accelerates and drives through the chum bucket]
  • Mr. Krabs: [laughs] Well, Plankton finally got what he deserved. [subtitles version Mr. Krabs: Well, Plankton finally got what he deserved. Then Squidward drives through the Krusty Krab.. Mr. Krabs starts crying]
  • Squidward: [headed toward a ramp and through a ring of fire] I've never felt so alive! [Clears the jump] I don't wanna stop!
  • [SpongeBob and Patrick pull up in a car]
  • SpongeBob: Squidward, are you sure you don't wanna stop?
  • Squidward: What are you talking about nitwit?!
  • SpongeBob: Up ahead!!!
  • Squidward: What up ahead?! [Squidward sees a cliff.. As he goes over the edge, he plays the slide whistle from high to low.. The tanker crashes.. Pause. Everyone but SpongeBob and Patrick cheer happily about Squidward's death.. SpongeBob and Patrick play a funeral march on the slide whistle.. Scene cuts to the Bikini Bottom Hospital]
  • Doctor Gill Gilliam: Your friend is very lucky. If it wasn't for that slide whistle getting lodged in his throat, the rescue team might have never found him. [The slide whistle starts going crazy in Squidward’s throat]
  • Doctor Gill Gilliam: His yelling, or whistling I should say, under all that rubble saved his life.
  • SpongeBob: Doctor, why did you leave the whistle in his throat?
  • Doctor Gill Gilliam: Unfortunately, we don't have the technology to remove it yet. But on the bright side, he can still communicate with us.
  • [The slide whistle starts going crazy again. Squidward is actually moving the slide whistle in a fit of anger, attempting to scream at SpongeBob and Patrick]
  • SpongeBob: Wow Squidward, listen to you! You're getting better already! Here we'll help. [SpongeBob and Patrick raise their slide whistles.. SpongeBob and Patrick go around the hospital playing the slide whistle to CPR, a guy on a ventilator, and Gill Gilliam stitching Nat up]