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This article is a transcript of the [[SpongeBob SquarePants]] special, "Plankton's Special Sinister Commentary". You can find it on the [[SpongeBob SquarePants Vs. The Big One]] DVD, which came out on March 3, 2009.
  
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|prev = Behind the Pantis
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|title = Plankton's Special Sinister Commentary
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|next = Square Roots: The Story of SpongeBob SquarePants
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|titlecard = Plankton's Special Sinister Commentary.jpg
⚫
*Plankton: Well, here it is, the Krusty Krab. The reasons of my nightmare and despair. Yep, it's SpongeBob SquareHead, my least favorite idiot. [Spongebob sweats] Yuck. [Shows up Squidward] Blecch, it's that squiddy thing with the tentacles. That guy is creeping me out. Will you look at that 2 loafers? Disgusting. I tell you, [Climbs the chair] I never been to the Krusty Krab, [Bounces] Open 24 hours a day, 7 days or weeks for the holidays in during disasters. [Show up Krabs] KRABS!!! UGH, How I hate you. I bet he never hears me and I get the peace of my mind, brother and I throw my mind into my brain because I get the Krabby Patty Formula for sure. He keeps it in the safe, you know. Show us the safe! '''''SHOW US THE SAFE!!! '''''[Shows melted shoes] Yeah, they won't show you that. that's a big secret.
  
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|specialnumber = 24
⚫
*Squidward: The fan stopped--
  
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|DVD = SpongeBob vs. The Big One (DVD)=[[March 3]], [[2009]]
⚫
*(Cuts to the beach)
  
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}}
⚫
*Plankton: The BEACH?! (Moans) I hate this already. Nobody goes to the beach anymore. Eeh, I'm Eugene Krabs, Listen to that yammering about that when you get the stunts... [Shows Krabby Patty] OOH! A Krabby Patty! I should be recording this-- Where did I put that camera? '''''Oh, no, I'M MISSING IT!!!''''' Once again, foiled by my own brain. Thanks a lot, brain, you really came through!
  
  ⚫
*'''Plankton:''' ''[as the curtain rises]'' Well, here it is, the Krusty Krab. The reasons of my nightmare and despair. Yep, it's SpongeBob SquareHead, my least favorite idiot. ''[SpongeBob sweats]'' Yuck. ''[Squidward appears]'' Blecch, it's that squiddy thing with the tentacles. That guy creeps me out. Will you look at those 2 loafers? Disgusting. I tell you, ''[climbs the chair]'' I never been to the Krusty Krab, ''[while bouncing on the seat]'' Open 24 hours a day, 7 days or weeks for the holidays in during disasters. ''[Mr. Krabs appears]'' KRABS!!! UGH, How I hate you! I bet he never hears me and I get the peace of my mind, brother. And I'd throw my mind into my brain so he can't see, and I'd get the Krabby Patty Formula for sure. He keeps it in the safe, you know. Show us the safe! '''''SHOW US THE SAFE!!!''''' ''[Shows melted shoes]'' Yeah, they won't show you that. that's a big secret.
⚫
*Squidward: I told you.
  
  ⚫
*'''Squidward:''' The fan stopped--
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*Sandy: YEEEEEEE...Earrings! Well, Cashy, I guess the Devil's Galley isn't so bad. As long as that Flying Dutchman doesn’t appear and stick us in Davy Jones' Locker! But that won't happen, will it Cashy?
  
  ⚫
*''[cut to the beach]''
⚫
*SpongeBob: Wha?
  
  ⚫
*'''Plankton: The BEACH?!''' ''[moans]'' I hate this already. Nobody goes to the beach anymore. Eeh, I'm Eugene Krabs, Listen to him yammer on it's amazing he got past the 3rd grade the big dunce ... ''[a Krabby Patty appears]'' OOH! A Krabby Patty! I should be recording this—Where did I put that camera? '''''Oh, no, I'M MISSING IT!!!''''' Once again, foiled by my own brain. Thanks a lot, brain, you really came through!
⚫
*Sandy: EEEEEEEE.....
  
  ⚫
*'''Squidward:''' I told you.
  +
*'''Sandy:''' YEEEEEEE...
  ⚫
*'''SpongeBob:''' Wha?
  ⚫
*'''Sandy:''' EEEEEEEE.....
 
*Plankton: Oh, yeah get to the talking squirrel thing. This is not entertainment. Go back to the krabby patty! '''''GO BACK NOW OR I'LL DESTROY THE ENTIRE COMMUNITY!!!''''' Nobody listens to me.
  
*Plankton: Oh, yeah get to the talking squirrel thing. This is not entertainment. Go back to the krabby patty! '''''GO BACK NOW OR I'LL DESTROY THE ENTIRE COMMUNITY!!!''''' Nobody listens to me.
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*Mr. Krabs: ...Get off me wave!
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*'''Mr. Krabs:''' ...Get off me wave!
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*Sandy: Cowabunga! (Surfs away)
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*'''Sandy:''' Cowabunga! ''[surfs away]''
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*Squidward: What next?
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*'''Squidward:''' What next?
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*Plankton: [Jumps patrick over the water] '''''AAAHH!!! A SHARK!!!''''' Pink shark? Oh, it's Patrick, the idiot best friend with that idiot SpongeBob who works with that idiot Krabs from the idiot Krusty Krab with that idiot safe... And the idiot secret formula waiting for idiot me to '''''TAKE IT!''''' Well, that don't work.
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*'''Plankton:''' ''[as Patrick pops up from the water]'' '''''AAAHH!!! A SHARK!!!''''' A pink shark? Oh, it's Patrick, the idiot best friend with that idiot SpongeBob who works with that idiot Krabs from the idiot Krusty Krab with that idiot safe... And the idiot secret formula waiting for idiot me to '''''TAKE IT!''''' Wait, that didn't come out right.
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*Spongebob: That's a good one, Patrick! "On Board!" WHOA-WHOA-WHOA!!!
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*'''SpongeBob:''' That's a good one, Patrick! "On Board!" WHOA-WHOA-WHOA!!!
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*Mr. Krabs: Careful!
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*'''Mr. Krabs:''' Careful!
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*Plankton: [Evil Laugh] Yeah, Capsize them. Look at that seastar, he got it on his face. Like 1 time.
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*'''Plankton:''' ''[laughs evilly]'' Yeah that's right, Capsize them. Look at that seastar, he got it on his face. That's unusual for an invertebrate.
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*Patrick: EEEEEEEEE...
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*'''Patrick:''' EEEEEEEEE...
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*Plankton: [Evil Laugh] '''''CHAOS!!! DESTRUCTION AND SCREAMING''''' just like mom used to make. [Evil Laugh] '''''LOVE IT!!!'''''
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*'''Plankton:''' ''[laughs evilly again]'' '''''CHAOS!!! DESTRUCTION AND SCREAMING''''' just like mom used to make. ''[laughs evilly yet again]'' '''''LOVE IT!!!'''''
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*[Cuts to Island]
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*''[cut to an island]''
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*Plankton: Well, for a matter of fact, here comes the hippies. [SpongeBob dragging seaweed from the ground making square] The nerve of that sponge dragging the poor seaweed under the ground. It might get infections, too, you know.
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*'''Plankton:''' Well well well, it was only a matter of time, here comes the hippies. ''[as SpongeBob drags seaweed from the ground making square]'' The nerve of that sponge dragging the poor seaweed under the ground. doesn't he know there's algae living in there? Some of my best friends are algae.
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*Twitch: Hey there, home dads.
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*'''Twitch:''' Hey there, home dads.
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*SpongeBob: Huh?
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*'''SpongeBob:''' Huh?
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*Twitch: Welcome to...
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*'''Twitch:''' Welcome to...
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*Plankton: Beach-combing, long-haired dimwits.
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*'''Plankton:''' Beach-combing, long-haired surf dimwits. Not my neighborhood, i'll tell ya that.
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*Twitch: ..Kimoswabey, Island. Although we are prefer to as... Island.
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*'''Twitch:''' ..Kimoswabey, Island. Although we are prefer to as... Island.
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*Plankton: Boy, this story's kepping dumber and dumber, and they will never do.
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*'''Plankton:''' Boy, this story's keeping dumber and dumber, but i'm waiting for my wash cycle to end so I don't got anywhere to go. Nothing else on.
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*Twitch: ..ways.
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*'''Twitch:''' ..ways.
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*Awesome Eddy: And waves.
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*'''Awesome Eddy:''' And waves.
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*Twitch: Mysterious waves.
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*'''Twitch:''' Mysterious waves.
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*All: Om.....
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*'''All:''' Om.....
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*Patrick: Om.....
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*'''Patrick:''' Om.....
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*Plankton: Om, I wish I have the Krabby Patty again, om..
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*'''Plankton:''' Om, I wish they'd show the Krabby Patty again, om..
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*Twitch: This is Awesome Eddy...
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*'''Twitch:''' This is Awesome Eddy...
 
*[Cuts to wave]
  
*[Cuts to wave]
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*All: AAAHH!!! [Almost nailed by those boards]
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*'''All:''' AAAHH!!! ''[as they almost get nailed by the boards]''
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*Plankton: Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! Look at that. Het almost got nailed by those boards. This is funny, i'm gonna write that down. "Nailed, by, those, boards." And I am gonna write a joke book full of zingers, stingers and headlines. It's called "Plankton's Punch Lines." Watch this. "If someone slips on a banana peel, Wouldn't that be more a-peeling?" [Laugh] That's funny, anyways. That's called a '''''PUNCH! '''''That kind a wise-cracking me up a bit so I can get to the Krabby Patty. Speaking of which, How come they have a Krabby Patty in a while-- '''''WHAT'S THE HOLD UP?!''''' [Squidward's suprised face. Big G Coughs before A Eddy says "What's that?" then Big G coughs again.] Hey, that's not funny at all, this guy is sick.
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*'''Plankton:''' Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! They almost got nailed by those boards. Hey that's a good one, i'm gonna write that down. "Nailed, by, those, boards." That's pretty good. I'm writing a joke book full of zingers, stingers and one-liners, it's called "Plankton's Punch Lines." Here's another on, "If someone slips on a banana peel, you could say, well I guess he didn't find that a-peeling!" ''[laughs]'' It's the "peel" part that gets them. That's called a '''''PUNCH!''''' That kind of wise-cracking makes everyone lose they're minds with laughter just so long enough so i can steal the formula. Speaking of which, How come they have a Krabby Patty in a while-- '''''WHAT'S THE HOLD UP?!''''' ''[Squidward's surprised face is shown before Big G Coughs before A Eddy says "What's that?" and Big G coughs again]''
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*Awesome Eddy: Oh, no. There's no way, dude. He'd never do it.
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*'''Awesome Eddy:''' Oh, no. There's no way, dude. He'd never do it.
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*Plankton: This guy needs a doctor because he get an infection. In fact, they have germs all over me, I can feel it. And now i'm sick.
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*'''Plankton:''' Okay that's not funny at all, this guy is sick. This guy needs a doctor and no one is doing anything about it. Those germs he's spraying are gonna get all over me, I can feel it. Then I'll be sick.
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*SpongeBob: Who?
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*'''SpongeBob:''' Who?
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*[Cuts to Jack Kahuna Laguna (JKL)]
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*''[cut to Jack Kahuna Laguna (JKL)]''
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*Plankton: '''''GOOD HEAVENS, WHO'S THAT?!''''' Because there's a weirdo behind it. All we have is another idiot is getting more scream time than the rest. '''''WHEN DOES IT END?!'''''
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*'''Plankton:''' '''''GOOD HEAVENS, WHO'S THAT?!''''' I've never seen that weirdo before in my life, what's his story? All I know is another idiot is getting more screen time me. '''''WHEN DOES IT END?!'''''
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*SpongeBob: Will you teach us how to surf, O Great One, so we may get back home?\
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*'''SpongeBob:''' Will you teach us how to surf, O Great One, so we may get back home?
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*Plankton: That guy's a peace of work.
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*'''Plankton:''' Oh this guy's a peace of work.
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*Patrick: Um...
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*'''Patrick:''' Um...
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*Squidward: Look, surf boy! Are you gonna teach us how to surf, or do we have to stand there and stare--
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*'''Squidward:''' Look, surf boy! Are you gonna teach us how to surf, or do we have to stand there and stare--
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*Plankton: Exactly! You tell him, octopus, You're wasting my time! He's wasting my time, too. [Cuts to Krabs with a beard] '''''KRABS!!! '''''Ugh, he snuck up on me there. Nice beard grandpa, why don't you read a bedtime story you old bottom-feeder?! [Evil Laugh]
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*'''Plankton:''' You tell him, octopus, he can't waste you're time like that! He's wasting my time, too. ''[cut to Krabs with a beard]'' '''''KRABS!!! '''''Ugh, he snuck up on me there. Nice beard grandpa, why don't you tell me a bedtime story you old bottom-feeder?! ''[laughs evilly]''
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*Krabs: Earrings! Well, Cashy, I guess the Devil's Galley isn't so bad. As long as that Flying Dutchman doesn’t appear and stick us in Davy Jones' Locker! But that won't happen, will it Cashy? (Cashy's drawer shoots out and hits the Flying Dutchman in the head)
 +
*'''Mr. Krabs:''' Earrings! Well, Cashy, I guess the Devil's Galley isn't so bad. As long as that Flying Dutchman doesn’t appear and stick us in Davy Jones' Locker! But that won't happen, will it Cashy? ''[Cashy's drawer shoots out and hits the Flying Dutchman in the head]''
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*Plankton: [Gasp] IT'S THE FLYING DUTCHMAN!!! Ooh, Krabs is gonna get it now, HAHAHAHAHA, Love it.
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*'''Plankton:''' ''[gasps]'' IT'S THE FLYING DUTCHMAN!!! Ooh, Krabs is gonna get it now, HAHAHAHAHA, Love it.
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*Flying Dutchman: Argh! Who be disturbing the Flying Dutchman's walk home from the convienence store? You even spilled me milk!
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*'''Flying Dutchman:''' Argh! Who be disturbing the Flying Dutchman's walk home from the convenience store? You even spilled me milk!
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*Krabs: Well, there ain't no use crying over it. (Lightning bolts shoot everywhere)
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*'''Mr. Krabs:''' Well, there ain't no use crying over it. ''[lightning bolts shoot everywhere]''
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*Plankton: Yeah, yeah, let 'em have it, Dutchie! Give him a lightning bolt in the face! [Evil Laugh] [Cuts to Flying Dutchman and Krabs] Oh, now you're talking. What are you waiting for, ghost boob? Give Krabs the old heave-ho! Seriously, the Dutchman can't hear me. [Lightning strikes] Aw, look, if a powerful ghost can't destroy krabs once and for all, i'll never get a Krabby Patty in my own hands.
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*'''Plankton:''' Yeah, yeah, let 'em have it, Dutchie! Give him a lightning bolt in the face! ''[laughs evilly again]'' ''[cut to Flying Dutchman and Mr. Krabs]'' Oh, now you're talking. What are you waiting for, ghost boob? Give Krabs the old heave-ho! Seriously, the Dutchman can't hear me. ''[lightning strikes]'' Okay, look, if a powerful ghost can't destroy Krabs at his most desperate moment, what is this world coming to?! If I was in this scene, I would have Krabs on a spit by now, and I'd have the Krabby Patty in my hands.
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*Krabs: ...On my Dear Aunt Sally's false teeth.
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*'''Mr. Krabs:''' ...on my Dear Aunt Sally's false teeth.
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*Flying Dutchman: '''''LIAR!!! '''''[Lightning strikes]
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*'''Flying Dutchman:''' '''''LIAR!!!''''' ''[lightning strikes again]''
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*Krabs: WHAT?!
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*'''Mr. Krabs:''' WHAT?!
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*Flying Dutchman: Your aunt Sally doesn't wear false teeth!
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*'''Flying Dutchman:''' Your aunt Sally doesn't wear false teeth!
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*Krabs: How do you know?
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*'''Mr. Krabs:''' How do you know?
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*Flying Dutchman: Because I dated her in high school!
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*'''Flying Dutchman:''' Because I dated her in high school!
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*Krabs: [GASP] NOOOOOOOO...!!!
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*'''Mr. Krabs:''' ''[gasps]'' NOOOOOOOO...!!!
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*Plankton: Hahahahaha! Krabs' Cash Register goes bye-bye! Well, it's Sandy the do-gooder, my least favorite freeloader. Oh, come on! She's gonna ruin everything. Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! This is fun just look like a parade!
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*'''Plankton:''' Hahahahaha! Krabs' Cash Register goes bye-bye! Well, it's Sandy the do-gooder, doing good again. Oh, come on! She's gonna ruin everything. Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! This is exciting just like a parade!
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*Flying Dutchman: I'm gonna ship you off...
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*'''Flying Dutchman:''' I'm gonna ship you off...
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*Plankton: '''''LOOK OUT, DUTCHMAN! '''''[Helicopter bonks Flying Dutchman] Yeah, they have that comin'.
 +
*'''Plankton:''' '''''LOOK OUT, DUTCHMAN!''''' ''[the helicopter bonks the Flying Dutchman]'' Wow, I didn't see that coming. Neither did he.
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*[Dutchman falls with Krabs in the Water]
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*[Dutchman falls with Mr. Krabs in the Water]
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*Sandy: '''''MAYDAY!!!!!! '''''[Pops Krabs out the water]
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*'''Sandy:''' '''''MAYDAY!!!!!!''''' ''[Mr. Krabs pops out of the water]''
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*Plankton: KRABS?!?!?!?! I thought he was destroyed.
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*'''Plankton:''' KRABS?!?!?!?! I thought he was destroyed.
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*SpongeBob: [Cuts to the Big One] '''''IT'S THE BIG ONE!'''''
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*'''SpongeBob:''' ''[cut to the Big One wave]'' '''''IT'S THE BIG ONE!'''''
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*Plankton: Way to tick. I thought he was chanting for my destruction. [Evil Laugh] Nice Special Effects! Because I get in to the dark alley, I'll be scared. Yeah, eat him, eat all of them! [Evil Laugh] It taste weird but it's good for you and it's good for me. No more SpongeBob, No more of his laughter, [Imitate SpongeBob Laugh], No more Squidward, No more Patrick, No more Krabs and no more worries. I can build a bank and sell insurance. Just when everybody loves me. [Lovely Sigh]
 +
*'''Plankton:''' Way to tick. I may just get my destruction after all. ''[laughs evilly]'' Nice Special Effects! If I saw that in a dark alley I'd be scared. Yeah, eat him, eat all of them! ''[laughs evilly again]'' It taste weird but it's good for you! Actually, it will be good for me. No more SpongeBob, No more of his laughter, ''[imitates SpongeBob's Laugh]'', No more Squidward, No more Patrick, No more Krabs and no more worries. I could stard a new career and sell insurance, like my dad. Then neveryone will love me. ''[sighs lovely]''
−
*SpongeBob: MR. KRABS!!!! I never even got a chance to tell him that I... [JKL is Silent]
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*''SpongeBob:''' MR. KRABS!!!! I never even got a chance to tell him that I... ''[JKL is silent]''
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*Plankton: '''''NO!!!!! '''''DON'T SAVE HIM! IF ANYONE IS NOT BE GETTING DESTROYED, I WILL BE HYPNOTIZED BY FLAVOR!
 +
*'''Plankton:''' '''''NO!!!!!''''' '''''DON'T SAVE HIM! HE'S A CORRUPTED FOOD SALESMAN! HE'S PART OF THE WHOLE PROBLEM WITH THIS OCEAN, AND HE'S GOT ALL MY COSTUMERS HYPNOTIZED BY FLAVOR!'''''
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*SpongeBob: '''''JKL!!! NO-HO-HO-HO!'''''
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*'''SpongeBob:''' '''''JKL!!! NO-HO-HO-HO!'''''
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*[Cuts to Spongebob, Twitch, Awesome Eddy, Big G, Chip, Silent Stan]
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*''[cut to SpongeBob, Twitch, Awesome Eddy, Big G, Chip, Silent Stan]''
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*Plankton: Hey what happened? I thought everyone is in peril! WHAT A CHIP!!! [Big G Coughs] [music plays] Everybody's Happy? Everybody's Dancing? Everybody is invited but not me! How come I get an invitation? The invitation got lost in the male--''''' OH I BET IT DID! '''''You know everybody's in town was turning into zombie slaves for a week and I have to let it go. But the theropy biography is correct. But that there is, Everyone who's not me, '''''STINKS ON ICE!!!''''' It was for free, no charge. I gotta go smash some atoms, that'll cheer me up.
 +
*'''Plankton:''' Hey, what happened? What did I miss? I thought everyone was in peril! WHAT A CHIP!!! ''[Big G coughs before the music plays]'' Everybody's happy? Everybody's dancing? Everybody is there but me! How come I never get invited to these things? The invitation probably got lost in the mail--'''''OH I BET IT DID!''''' You know, you try to turn everybody in the town into zombie slaves a couple of times, and they never let it go. This proves my scientific theory is correct, and that theory is, Anybody who's not me, '''''STINKS ON ICE!!!''''' That one's for free, no charge. I'm gonna go smash some atoms, that'll cheer me up. ''[Plankton leaves as the curtain closes]''

Revision as of 18:55, 11 February 2016

Mermaid Man & Barnacle Boy VI The Motion Picture 123
"Cut! No, Mermaid Man, it's 'stolen Krabby Patties.'"

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This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants DVD bonus feature "Plankton's Special Sinister Commentary." It can be found in the SpongeBob vs. The Big One DVD, which was released on March 3, 2009.

  • Plankton: [as the curtain rises] Well, here it is, the Krusty Krab. The reasons of my nightmare and despair. Yep, it's SpongeBob SquareHead, my least favorite idiot. [SpongeBob sweats] Yuck. [Squidward appears] Blecch, it's that squiddy thing with the tentacles. That guy creeps me out. Will you look at those 2 loafers? Disgusting. I tell you, [climbs the chair] I never been to the Krusty Krab, [while bouncing on the seat] Open 24 hours a day, 7 days or weeks for the holidays in during disasters. [Mr. Krabs appears] KRABS!!! UGH, How I hate you! I bet he never hears me and I get the peace of my mind, brother. And I'd throw my mind into my brain so he can't see, and I'd get the Krabby Patty Formula for sure. He keeps it in the safe, you know. Show us the safe! SHOW US THE SAFE!!! [Shows melted shoes] Yeah, they won't show you that. that's a big secret.
  • Squidward: The fan stopped--
  • [cut to the beach]
  • Plankton: The BEACH?! [moans] I hate this already. Nobody goes to the beach anymore. Eeh, I'm Eugene Krabs, Listen to him yammer on it's amazing he got past the 3rd grade the big dunce ... [a Krabby Patty appears] OOH! A Krabby Patty! I should be recording this—Where did I put that camera? Oh, no, I'M MISSING IT!!! Once again, foiled by my own brain. Thanks a lot, brain, you really came through!
  • Squidward: I told you.
  • Sandy: YEEEEEEE...
  • SpongeBob: Wha?
  • Sandy: EEEEEEEE.....
  • Plankton: Oh, yeah get to the talking squirrel thing. This is not entertainment. Go back to the krabby patty! GO BACK NOW OR I'LL DESTROY THE ENTIRE COMMUNITY!!! Nobody listens to me.
  • Mr. Krabs: ...Get off me wave!
  • Sandy: Cowabunga! [surfs away]
  • Squidward: What next?
  • Plankton: [as Patrick pops up from the water] AAAHH!!! A SHARK!!! A pink shark? Oh, it's Patrick, the idiot best friend with that idiot SpongeBob who works with that idiot Krabs from the idiot Krusty Krab with that idiot safe... And the idiot secret formula waiting for idiot me to TAKE IT! Wait, that didn't come out right.
  • SpongeBob: That's a good one, Patrick! "On Board!" WHOA-WHOA-WHOA!!!
  • Mr. Krabs: Careful!
  • Plankton: [laughs evilly] Yeah that's right, Capsize them. Look at that seastar, he got it on his face. That's unusual for an invertebrate.
  • Patrick: EEEEEEEEE...
  • Plankton: [laughs evilly again] CHAOS!!! DESTRUCTION AND SCREAMING just like mom used to make. [laughs evilly yet again] LOVE IT!!!
  • [cut to an island]
  • Plankton: Well well well, it was only a matter of time, here comes the hippies. [as SpongeBob drags seaweed from the ground making square] The nerve of that sponge dragging the poor seaweed under the ground. doesn't he know there's algae living in there? Some of my best friends are algae.
  • Twitch: Hey there, home dads.
  • SpongeBob: Huh?
  • Twitch: Welcome to...
  • Plankton: Beach-combing, long-haired surf dimwits. Not my neighborhood, i'll tell ya that.
  • Twitch: ..Kimoswabey, Island. Although we are prefer to as... Island.
  • Plankton: Boy, this story's keeping dumber and dumber, but i'm waiting for my wash cycle to end so I don't got anywhere to go. Nothing else on.
  • Twitch: ..ways.
  • Awesome Eddy: And waves.
  • Twitch: Mysterious waves.
  • All: Om.....
  • Patrick: Om.....
  • Plankton: Om, I wish they'd show the Krabby Patty again, om..
  • Twitch: This is Awesome Eddy...
  • [Cuts to wave]
  • All: AAAHH!!! [as they almost get nailed by the boards]
  • Plankton: Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! They almost got nailed by those boards. Hey that's a good one, i'm gonna write that down. "Nailed, by, those, boards." That's pretty good. I'm writing a joke book full of zingers, stingers and one-liners, it's called "Plankton's Punch Lines." Here's another on, "If someone slips on a banana peel, you could say, well I guess he didn't find that a-peeling!" [laughs] It's the "peel" part that gets them. That's called a PUNCH! That kind of wise-cracking makes everyone lose they're minds with laughter just so long enough so i can steal the formula. Speaking of which, How come they have a Krabby Patty in a while-- WHAT'S THE HOLD UP?! [Squidward's surprised face is shown before Big G Coughs before A Eddy says "What's that?" and Big G coughs again]
  • Awesome Eddy: Oh, no. There's no way, dude. He'd never do it.
  • Plankton: Okay that's not funny at all, this guy is sick. This guy needs a doctor and no one is doing anything about it. Those germs he's spraying are gonna get all over me, I can feel it. Then I'll be sick.
  • SpongeBob: Who?
  • [cut to Jack Kahuna Laguna (JKL)]
  • Plankton: GOOD HEAVENS, WHO'S THAT?! I've never seen that weirdo before in my life, what's his story? All I know is another idiot is getting more screen time me. WHEN DOES IT END?!
  • SpongeBob: Will you teach us how to surf, O Great One, so we may get back home?
  • Plankton: Oh this guy's a peace of work.
  • Patrick: Um...
  • Squidward: Look, surf boy! Are you gonna teach us how to surf, or do we have to stand there and stare--
  • Plankton: You tell him, octopus, he can't waste you're time like that! He's wasting my time, too. [cut to Krabs with a beard] KRABS!!! Ugh, he snuck up on me there. Nice beard grandpa, why don't you tell me a bedtime story you old bottom-feeder?! [laughs evilly]
  • Mr. Krabs: Earrings! Well, Cashy, I guess the Devil's Galley isn't so bad. As long as that Flying Dutchman doesn’t appear and stick us in Davy Jones' Locker! But that won't happen, will it Cashy? [Cashy's drawer shoots out and hits the Flying Dutchman in the head]
  • Plankton: [gasps] IT'S THE FLYING DUTCHMAN!!! Ooh, Krabs is gonna get it now, HAHAHAHAHA, Love it.
  • Flying Dutchman: Argh! Who be disturbing the Flying Dutchman's walk home from the convenience store? You even spilled me milk!
  • Mr. Krabs: Well, there ain't no use crying over it. [lightning bolts shoot everywhere]
  • Plankton: Yeah, yeah, let 'em have it, Dutchie! Give him a lightning bolt in the face! [laughs evilly again] [cut to Flying Dutchman and Mr. Krabs] Oh, now you're talking. What are you waiting for, ghost boob? Give Krabs the old heave-ho! Seriously, the Dutchman can't hear me. [lightning strikes] Okay, look, if a powerful ghost can't destroy Krabs at his most desperate moment, what is this world coming to?! If I was in this scene, I would have Krabs on a spit by now, and I'd have the Krabby Patty in my hands.
  • Mr. Krabs: ...on my Dear Aunt Sally's false teeth.
  • Flying Dutchman: LIAR!!! [lightning strikes again]
  • Mr. Krabs: WHAT?!
  • Flying Dutchman: Your aunt Sally doesn't wear false teeth!
  • Mr. Krabs: How do you know?
  • Flying Dutchman: Because I dated her in high school!
  • Mr. Krabs: [gasps] NOOOOOOOO...!!!
  • Plankton: Hahahahaha! Krabs' Cash Register goes bye-bye! Well, it's Sandy the do-gooder, doing good again. Oh, come on! She's gonna ruin everything. Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! This is exciting just like a parade!
  • Flying Dutchman: I'm gonna ship you off...
  • Plankton: LOOK OUT, DUTCHMAN! [the helicopter bonks the Flying Dutchman] Wow, I didn't see that coming. Neither did he.
  • [Dutchman falls with Mr. Krabs in the Water]
  • Sandy: MAYDAY!!!!!! [Mr. Krabs pops out of the water]
  • Plankton: KRABS?!?!?!?! I thought he was destroyed.
  • SpongeBob: [cut to the Big One wave] IT'S THE BIG ONE!
  • Plankton: Way to tick. I may just get my destruction after all. [laughs evilly] Nice Special Effects! If I saw that in a dark alley I'd be scared. Yeah, eat him, eat all of them! [laughs evilly again] It taste weird but it's good for you! Actually, it will be good for me. No more SpongeBob, No more of his laughter, [imitates SpongeBob's Laugh], No more Squidward, No more Patrick, No more Krabs and no more worries. I could stard a new career and sell insurance, like my dad. Then neveryone will love me. [sighs lovely]
  • SpongeBob:' MR. KRABS!!!! I never even got a chance to tell him that I... [JKL is silent]
  • Plankton: NO!!!!! DON'T SAVE HIM! HE'S A CORRUPTED FOOD SALESMAN! HE'S PART OF THE WHOLE PROBLEM WITH THIS OCEAN, AND HE'S GOT ALL MY COSTUMERS HYPNOTIZED BY FLAVOR!
  • SpongeBob: JKL!!! NO-HO-HO-HO!
  • [cut to SpongeBob, Twitch, Awesome Eddy, Big G, Chip, Silent Stan]
  • Plankton: Hey, what happened? What did I miss? I thought everyone was in peril! WHAT A CHIP!!! [Big G coughs before the music plays] Everybody's happy? Everybody's dancing? Everybody is there but me! How come I never get invited to these things? The invitation probably got lost in the mail--OH I BET IT DID! You know, you try to turn everybody in the town into zombie slaves a couple of times, and they never let it go. This proves my scientific theory is correct, and that theory is, Anybody who's not me, STINKS ON ICE!!! That one's for free, no charge. I'm gonna go smash some atoms, that'll cheer me up. [Plankton leaves as the curtain closes]
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