Encyclopedia SpongeBobia
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Encyclopedia SpongeBobia

This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Penny Foolish" from season 6, which aired on March 7, 2008.

  • [The episode starts at the Discount Grocery Mart. Mr. Krabs places a basket of items on the counter and Incidental 104 scans them.]
  • Incidental 104: Price check on industrial size econo pack of raw fiber.
  • Mr. Krabs: Ah, it goes in like steel wool, but comes out like an angel from heaven.
  • Incidental 104: [sarcastically] Please, tell me more.
  • Mr. Krabs: Ooh, well, this one time I...
  • Incidental 104: Not really.
  • Mr. Krabs: I didn't think so. Ooh, wait, I almost forgot me coupons! [hands her a lot of coupons] There's a couple double ones in there, too.
  • Incidental 104: Sir, these expired over 30 years ago.
  • Mr. Krabs: What does that mean?
  • Incidental 104: It means they're no good, sir. I'll just throw those away for you.
  • Mr. Krabs: No, wait! I'll take 'em.
  • Incidental 104: Okay, sir, your change today is going to be exactly ten cents.
  • Mr. Krabs: Come to papa! Come to papa! [two nickels slide out] Yay! Two nickels. [laughs, then gasps as he notices SpongeBob walking on the street] Hey, that's SpongeBob out there! [SpongeBob does some weird things] What in blue blazes is that boy up to? [SpongeBob points to something that appears to be a penny. Two fish passing by look at him. SpongeBob picks it up and puts it in his pocket] Well, I'll be a geriatric jellyfish! SpongeBob found a penny! A bright shiny penny just sitting there, and he picked it right up! Huh, I can remember the whole thing as if it just happened a moment ago. [Mr. Krabs imagines what just happened]
  • SpongeBob: [in the thought bubble] Sir? Sir?! [it is actually Incidental 104]
  • Incidental 104: ...Sir?! [thought bubble disappears]
  • Mr. Krabs: What?
  • Incidental 104: You're holding up the line.
  • Mr. Krabs: [a long line of angry fish is shown] Ooh, I am? [leaves]
  • Incidental 104: Next, please. [cuts to night where Mr. Krabs is driving his boat]
  • Mr. Krabs: Interesting how things work out that way. Some folks just walk along and stumble over free money, while others, others, they work! [zooms out seeing that there's another car next to his and hearing dolphin chirps from Mr. Krabs]
  • Billy: Hey, mommy, look at that weird guy in the car over there.
  • Billy's Mom: Billy, mommy's watching the road right now.
  • Mr. Krabs: I mean, why couldn't I have just walked along and found it? I have legs, too, you know! [sighs] How about a little music. [music dial turns into a penny. Mr. Krabs gasps and screams] Okay, okay, get a grip, Krabs. Just concentrate on driving. [steering wheel turns into a penny. Mr. Krabs screams and lets go of it, then holds it again] Okay, getting all worked up over a little coin. [laughs] Ah, it must just be the full moon. Wait a second. [the moon turns into a penny, and Mr. Krabs screams] I.. gotta... have... that... penny! [cuts to next day at the Krusty Krab, SpongeBob walks in] Good morning, SpongeBob.
  • SpongeBob: Good morning, Mr. Krabs!
  • Mr. Krabs: Find anything special lately?
  • SpongeBob: Yae-yes!
  • Mr. Krabs: Really?
  • SpongeBob: Yup!
  • Mr. Krabs: And you want to share it with your old uncle Krabs, don't you, boy?
  • SpongeBob: Of course!
  • Mr. Krabs: Great! Well, share it with me!
  • SpongeBob: [laughs] I already am sharing it with you, Mr. Krabs.
  • Mr. Krabs: Wha.. What?
  • SpongeBob: The thing I found was a bright, shiny, new... day! Well, I'll be in the kitchen if you need me. [talking to Squidward] Good morning, Squidward!
  • Squidward: Don't talk to me.
  • SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs seems to be in a good mood today.
  • Squidward: That counts as talking. [SpongeBob walks into the kitchen, and Mr. Krabs is in there]
  • SpongeBob: Whoa! Hello again, Mr. Krabs.
  • Mr. Krabs: Hello, SpongeBob.
  • SpongeBob: What can I do you for?
  • Mr. Krabs: Can I borrow a penny?
  • SpongeBob: A penny? Sure. [checks his pocket] Hmm, sorry. All out of pennies right now.
  • Mr. Krabs: But did you check all your pockets?
  • SpongeBob: Well, I thought I did.
  • Mr. Krabs: Front pockets? [SpongeBob checks]
  • SpongeBob: Hmm, no.
  • Mr. Krabs: Back? [SpongeBob checks]
  • SpongeBob: Hmm-mm.
  • Mr. Krabs: Shirt pockets? [SpongeBob checks]
  • SpongeBob: Nuh-uh.
  • Mr. Krabs: Shoe pockets?
  • SpongeBob: [laughs] Shoe pockets. Oh, Mr. Krabs, that is just ridiculous.
  • Mr. Krabs: It is?
  • SpongeBob: Well, I do have a tie pocket though. [SpongeBob checks] No, not in there either.
  • Mr. Krabs: Hey, maybe it fell in your sock.
  • SpongeBob: Well, I...
  • Mr. Krabs: Did you check there? [holds SpongeBob upside down, and shakes him, SpongeBob's brain falls out] Uhh?
  • SpongeBob: Hey, look, it's my brain! [brain grows legs and walks away] Hey, where's it going? [brain walks through a crack] Ooh, there. [brain crawls on Squidward, and SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs follow it, they find it under a barrel] Aha! [brain squirts liquid at him] Ugh! [SpongeBob laughs. He grabs his brain] Not so fast, little guy. There now. Yes, I know. Come here. [brain crawls back into SpongeBob's head]
  • Mr. Krabs: Uhh?
  • SpongeBob: What's the matter, Mr. Krabs? Didn't you know I was a brain whisperer?
  • Mr. Krabs: So, uhh, no penny, huh?
  • SpongeBob: Nope.
  • Mr. Krabs: Darn! [cuts to later when SpongeBob is mopping, and hears a noise]
  • SpongeBob: Squidward, these deafening construction sounds are preventing me from working.
  • Squidward: Me, too.
  • SpongeBob: You think we should walk out back to investigate?
  • Squidward: Never. [SpongeBob and Squidward are now walking out back]
  • SpongeBob: The sounds were coming from back here. What the? [a movie theater is being built]
  • Mr. Krabs: Careful with those marquee ladders!
  • SpongeBob: Hey, Mr. Krabs, you made your own movie theater!
  • Mr. Krabs: Yes, I did.
  • SpongeBob: Yay!
  • Mr. Krabs: And you're just in time for the grand opening! [pulls a lever that turns on the electricity on. Removes his construction hat and wears a magician hat] Step right up, folks, and witness a spellbinding tale chock full of adventure, and action, and thrills... [Mr. Krabs is chirping like a dolphin as two fish walk up]
  • Frank: You know, I'm not really hungry.
  • Fred: Yeah, let's go see what this fat guy is yelling about.
  • Mr. Krabs: ...witness the terrifying challenges overcome by... by...
  • Fred: By who?
  • Mr. Krabs: by a... by a plucky young sponge!
  • SpongeBob: Just like me!
  • Mr. Krabs: That's right! And the best part is: admission is only one penny!
  • Squidward: Does a movie like that even exist?
  • Fred: Yeah, does it?!
  • Mr. Krabs: Uhh, well, actually, I was going to show you this flip book and...
  • Squidward: A flip book?
  • Fred: Yeah, I don't even know what that is!! [everyone angrily walks away]
  • Mr. Krabs: No, wait. Noooooooo!
  • SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs, can I see the movie now? Please?
  • Mr. Krabs: Of course you can, lad! [SpongeBob smiles] You just gotta give me one penny.
  • SpongeBob: But, but...
  • Mr. Krabs: But what?
  • SpongeBob: But, I really don't have a penny. [Mr. Krabs screams in anger, his eye twitches, then he drives a crane with a wrecking ball to demolish the theater. SpongeBob runs off. After demolishing the theater, a puff of smoke flies to Mr. Krabs and pops at his face. Cuts to night where SpongeBob is walking to the Krusty Krab at night] Huh, that's too bad. I really wanted to see that movie. [enters the Krusty Krab] Oh, well. [Squidward is dressed like a waiter]
  • Squidward: Good evening, [SpongeBob whistles] and [Squidward looks at a piece of paper] welcome to the [looks at paper] Krusty Krab semi-annual charity night.
  • SpongeBob: Squidward? You look beautiful!
  • Squidward: Let me show you to your table.
  • SpongeBob: My table? Fancy. [gasps] My very own name tag! [lights turn off and Squidward sighs, as he shines a flash light on Mr. Krabs]
  • Mr. Krabs: Hello, and welcome to a very important evening. Tonight's event is entitled: Pennies, for the penny-less. And before the following images are shown, I would ask each of you to look not look with your eyes, but with your heart. [Mr. Krabs shows some images] Three dimes, two nickels, one quarter, zero pennies. And since I realize the images seen here tonight may be wretchedly hideous, I am going to tell you what you can do to end this travesty: You can donate one penny to me: Mr. Krabs. Also known as: Mr. Krabs, the man who doesn't have one. [Mr. Krabs starts crying and SpongeBob is crying, too]
  • SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs.
  • Mr. Krabs: [cheered up] Yes?
  • SpongeBob: I would like to donate a penny.
  • Mr. Krabs: You would?
  • SpongeBob: If I only had one! [SpongeBob starts crying, Mr. Krabs' tie disappears while his eyes go into his head, and he screams. The scene then cuts to SpongeBob's house, Mr. Krabs is using a flower delivery truck to spy on his house, he is speaking gibberish, he notices SpongeBob walking out the door, he walks in, with a metal detector, and then Mr. Krabs looks around]
  • Mr. Krabs: Hiding it, somewhere. Hiding it. Hiding it. Hiding it. Hiding it.
  • Gary: Meow.
  • Mr. Krabs: What's that? You! You know where!
  • Gary: Meow. [Mr. Krabs picks him up]
  • Mr. Krabs: Tell where!
  • Gary: Meow.
  • Mr. Krabs: Hiding it, inside, [reaches into Gary's shell] in there, somewhere. [lights come on, and SpongeBob walks in holding a drink]
  • SpongeBob: [gasps] Mr. Krabs! What is this metal detector doing on the floor? These should only be stored on special racks. [gasps] And you're not wearing your metal detector handling gloves!
  • Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, I just wanted that penny you found on the street yesterday. Oh, I'm sorry.
  • SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs, that wasn't a penny. [laughs]
  • Mr. Krabs: It wasn't?
  • SpongeBob: No, that was just a dried up piece of gum for my collection. I think it's peppermint.
  • Mr. Krabs: Ah ha ha ha ha hooooooooo hoo. I feel so relieved. There was no penny after all! Well, I'll be going now, You can keep the metal detector, SpongeBob. See ya!
  • SpongeBob: Thanks, Mr. Krabs. Here, Gary, you can play with that. [Gary sniffs it, then blows a raspberry at it, and slithers away, the gum then absorbs the spit] Hey, this isn't gum at all. [pulls it out, revealing that it is a $500 bill] Just a dumb old $500 bill. This won't go with my chewed-up gum collection. Oh, well. Good night, Gary.
  • [turns off the light, then zooms out revealing that Mr. Krabs is digging holes outside of his house looking for the penny]
  • Mr. Krabs: That, me penny, he must've buried it around here somewhere. I'll just have to keep digging.
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