Patchy's Dance Tips is an instructional video series made by Patchy the Pirate. This in-universe set of videos appears in the episode "Party Pooper Pants." The dance tips are also mentioned to cost only $29.95 for the whole video collection.
- Volume 1
- Volume 2
- Volume 3
- Volume 4: Dance Yer Parrot Off!
- The fine print for the offer reads: "It is unlawful to blah blah blah. In the event of blah blah blah the said person blah blah blah. Will who there for blah will blah and it shall be the soul responsibility to blah blah when in the case of blah blah blah. In so there too, henceforth blah will be blah."