Encyclopedia SpongeBobia
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Encyclopedia SpongeBobia

This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "MuscleBob BuffPants" from season 1, which aired on October 2, 1999.

  • [The episode begins at SpongeBob's house. In SpongeBob's house, he is looking at himself in the mirror trying to look strong.]
  • SpongeBob: It's time to grow myself large and wide.
  • [He grows himself large and wide as he is saying it. He walks over to his weight, which is a pink bunny and a blue bear, and has trouble lifting it, but manages to get it over his head anyway. The doorbell rings and SpongeBob opens the door.]
  • Sandy: Howdy, SpongeBob. How's it goin'?
  • SpongeBob: Not too close, Sandy. I tend to get smelly when I'm pumping iron. Check it out. [shows off his muscles, but is still a weakling]
  • Sandy: Well, you're smelly.
  • SpongeBob: All thanks to my state-of-the-art work set. [shows all sorts of stuffed animals]
  • Sandy: Uhh... I don't wanna disappoint you, SpongeBob, but you won't see any progress with those.
  • SpongeBob: Oh, really?
  • Sandy: That is, if you want arms like these. [rolls up her right sleeve, and flexes her right arm, showing off a big, impressive bicep] Or these! [rolls up her other sleeve and flexes her left arm, revealing her other bicep] Or these! [shows off her powerful back muscles while executing a back double bicep flex.]
  • [SpongeBob's arm wiggles in the air]
  • SpongeBob: Well, uhh, maybe I could use a little help.
  • Sandy: Well, if you want arms like mine, you just gotta follow my training program.
  • SpongeBob: Wow, really? That'd be great, Sandy! I can see me now. [imagines himself with muscles and very tall working at the Krusty Krab, singing and jellyfishing at Jellyfish Fields and telling Gary goodnight, too big for his bed] Yeah... that would change everything!
  • Sandy: Be at my place at 5 a.m. Oh! And you'll need a water helmet. [puts a fish bowl on his head.]
  • [Bubble transition to Sandy's tree dome, where SpongeBob is trying to do push-ups]
  • Sandy: Come on, SpongeBob, it's only push-ups! Come on. Come on! You can do it!
  • [SpongeBob is grunting at this point determined to get a push-up. His body cracks and falls down while his arms stay up]
  • SpongeBob: One. [acorn bell dings]
  • Sandy: [in a boxing ring with gloves on] Alright, put 'em up!
  • SpongeBob: [struggles getting his gloves up] They're up.
  • Sandy: Ding ding! [punches SpongeBob out of the ring. Later, Sandy starts up her exercise wheel with SpongeBob on it. SpongeBob pants while the wheel goes faster and makes him trip all over the wheel] Feeling the burn?
  • SpongeBob: I'm-fee-ling-some-thing! [launches out of the wheel and into the tree dome glass]
  • Sandy: Well, now that we've got you warmed up, it's time for the arm-cruncher.
  • SpongeBob: Arm-cruncher, great. [looks over and sees two cement blocks slamming into the cement pedestal] This squirrel's trying to kill me!
  • Sandy: [walks up to the arm-cruncher with phone in hand] This is it.
  • SpongeBob: Hey, that's great, Sandy. Well, I sure had fun, we'll have to do it again sometime, bye. [hangs up] This working-out thing isn't working out. [his arms bulge in and out] Ow. Ow. Ow.
  • TV: Hey! Hey, you! Wimpy, wimpy, wimpy! "Oh, I'm a little peanut worm." Are you too much of a wimp to work out? Are you a weakling built like a sponge? Well, now you too can have muscles.
  • SpongeBob: Huh?
  • TV: With Anchor Arms! [puts a long pink blow-up item on his arm] They slip on like a glove. Just add air. [puts a plug in the arm's hole and pumps air into it] How big do you want 'em? [pumps air into the other arm] Normal? [puts more air into the arm] Veiny?! And for the ladies... [puts air into the arm which makes it grow hair] ...hairy. [SpongeBob whistles as the TV puts up an image of a weak shark] I was a wimp before Anchor Arms. Now, I'm a jerk and everybody loves me. So order now, wimp!
  • SpongeBob: Wow, now that's a good idea!
  • Gary: Meow.
  • SpongeBob: I wanna be just like him. Yeah, I've gotta get to a phone! [later, a big shadow of SpongeBob is walking down the road past Squidward, who is sitting in a chair licking a popsicle] Hi, Squidward!
  • Squidward: [with his tongue stuck to the popsicle while looking up] SpongeBob?
  • [Cuts to Mr. Krabs sweeping the outside of the Krusty Krab.]
  • Mr. Krabs: [looks up] Huh?
  • SpongeBob: Ahoy, Mr. Krabs!
  • Mr. Krabs: Mother of pearl! [hides in the Krusty Krab. Cuts to Mussel Beach where everyone is lifting weights. SpongeBob comes in and makes Incidental 24C drop a big weight on Incidental 24B and Incidental 24Q's feet]
  • Incidental 24B and Incidental 24Q: Ow...
  • SpongeBob: Hi, guys. [shows off his new muscles]
  • Larry: SpongeBob, is that you?
  • SpongeBob: [walking on his hands] Who were you expecting, Tiny Tim? Wait... wait... [flexes his muscles] They're big, aren't they?
  • Larry: Dude, you're ripped!
  • SpongeBob: [flexes out the words] Thank...You. I've been working out. Excuse me a second. [flexes more] Yeah. Anyone up for the... [flexes his muscles into drinks] ...juice bar? [bubble transition to outside of the juice bar]
  • Scooter: [to Incidental 18] I'm tellin' ya, he's huge!
  • Sandy: [walks up to them] Have you guys seen SpongeBob anywhere?
  • Scooter: You mean 'MuscleBob BuffPants'? He's in there! [points to the inside of the juice bar]
  • Sandy: Uhh, whatever. Thanks. [walks to the juice bar]
  • SpongeBob: [now inside] I start off with twenty raw eggs every day. But that's just me.
  • Sandy: Pardon me.
  • SpongeBob: Working out is my life! I remember when I used to look like that guy over there. [points to Incidental 35]
  • Incidental 35: Who me? [everyone laughs]
  • SpongeBob: I remember when I used to look like you, too. [points to Larry and laughs] But, that was a long time ago.
  • Incidental 6: Here's your drink, sir.
  • SpongeBob: Thank you. [tries to lift up his drink but can't so he stretches his mouth out to the straw and drinks] Yeah...
  • Sandy: SpongeBob? Wha-where'd you get those muscles?
  • SpongeBob: I've created my own workout routine that's given me amazing results. [his anchor arm almost slips off] Whoops! Yeah, I have never felt better.
  • Sandy: Heck, what's your secret?
  • SpongeBob: What?
  • Sandy: Your secret workout. What is it? [everyone wants to know and looks over at SpongeBob. SpongeBob thinks of something nervously and quickly]
  • SpongeBob: Hmmm, well... I, uhh... first I take my hand and I do this... [makes armpit noises]
  • Larry: Are you kidding?
  • SpongeBob: Do these muscles lie? [flexes his muscles into a shape of a sponge. Everyone starts making armpit noises]
  • Sandy: I'm glad to see you found an exercise program that works for you.
  • SpongeBob: Yeah, your workout routine wasn't quite tough enough for me.
  • Sandy: Can't argue with those results. What you need to do now is put those muscles to the test.
  • SpongeBob: Uhh, what do you mean?
  • Sandy: The big Mussel Beach anchor tossing competition. It's today! Everybody'll be there!
  • Incidental 6: Here's your drink. [sets the drink on SpongeBob's anchor-arm hand and it sinks down]
  • Sandy: Hey, with those arms, you'll do great!
  • SpongeBob: Uhh, well, I'm not sure.
  • Sandy: C'mon, let's go.
  • SpongeBob: Right now?! Wait, uhh, wait, Sandy. I don't think it's such a... [tries to run away but the drink is holding him back. He tries lifting the drink but is unsuccessful] Sandy, wait!
  • Sandy: Here it is-- the sign-in list.
  • SpongeBob: Oh, no.
  • Sandy: [signs her name on a piece of paper] Okay, Sandy... [cuts to SpongeBob struggling to lift his drink, then back to Sandy] Cheeks.
  • SpongeBob: [still struggling] Wait, Sandy-- don't sign just yet! [Sandy puts the paper into the entry box. He strains]
  • Sandy: Okay...
  • SpongeBob: Wait!
  • Sandy: [signs SpongeBob's name on a piece of paper] SpongeBob SquarePants. [Incidental 6 lifts the drink off of SpongeBob, which sends him flying towards Sandy, who puts the paper into the entry box]
  • SpongeBob: Sandy, wait...! [slams into a pole]
  • Sandy: It's okay, SpongeBob, I already signed your name in.
  • SpongeBob: Oh, great. Thanks, Sandy. [bubble transition to the competition]
  • Sports guy: We on? Welcome to the Goo Lagoon 8th annual anchor toss competition. [everyone is getting ready but SpongeBob is nervous]
  • Sandy: Ready, SpongeBob?
  • SpongeBob: Oh, yeah. Sure. No problem. [blows frantically into his Anchor Arms]
  • Sports guy: Could I get some mustard on that? Oh. First up, Don the Whale. [Incidental 32 throws the anchor and it lands. A fish comes up to measure the distance]
  • Measurer: 200 yards. [the crowd cheers]
  • Sports guy: Let's see an instant-replay. [another anchor comes flying in on top of the measuring fish and hits him] Amazing! Up next, Larry the Lobster. [Larry throws his anchor. The measuring fish runs away from the anchor but it follows him and crushes him once again]
  • Measurer: 210 yards!
  • Sports guy: Here goes, Sandy Cheeks. [Sandy throws it up in the air and kicks it away. The measuring fish runs around trying to avoid getting hit by the anchor but the anchor crushes him anyway]
  • Measurer: 510 yards!
  • Sports guy: Wow! Fabulous!
  • Sandy: Beat that, SpongeBob!
  • Sports guy: Up next, SpongeBob SquarePants.
  • Crowd: [imitates the armpit exercise while others are holding up SpongeBob signs and chanting] SpongeBob! SpongeBob! SpongeBob!
  • SpongeBob: [tries to pull the anchor but instead he falls under the ground with the anchor and comes out and laughs] Just kidding. Just kidding. [everyone laughs]
  • Sandy: That SpongeBob is funnier than ears on an acorn.
  • SpongeBob: Oh, this is it. They're all gonna find out I'm a fake. I can't give up. I've got to try. I can do it! I've got Anchor Arms! I'm no wimp, I'm a jerk! [blows his Anchor Arms over the "JERK" size, which makes the arms very huge and incredibly enormous] Yeah! [tries to lift the anchor again but when he tries too hard, veins grow on his arms, and some of the air in one arm goes into his nose. He tries to lift the anchor again, but the air goes into his left eye as the crowd 'ooh's. He tries to lift the anchor again and causes the air to go into his left tooth. He tries to lift the anchor again for the last time, causing the Anchor Arms to burst around his body, then explode. After the air blows off, the popped Anchor Arms deflate, floating down. SpongeBob then reveals his real arms hidden from inside his body]
  • Crowd: Ooohh...
  • Crowd attendee: Um...I think he lost.
  • Crowd: [starts chanting for Sandy] Sandy! Sandy! Sandy!
  • [Sandy walks up to SpongeBob and taps her foot, disappointed. SpongeBob walks away, leaving his destroyed Anchor Arms on the ground and follows Sandy to the treedome.]
  • SpongeBob: 96. 97. 98. 99. 100.
  • Sandy: I want 100 more.
  • SpongeBob: It hurts. [changes the channel over and over] 1. 2. 3. 4...
  • Sandy: I think we finally found an exercise for you, SpongeBob.
  • SpongeBob: ...9. 10. [his arm falls off] Can you get that?
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