Patrick:[walking] So why are we going to Sandy's house?
SpongeBob: To see her vacation slides for the hu.. [gets smacked in face by door] Ow!
ZDS Agent:[Walking out the door with his partner and the slides] We got the slides, sir.
[The both get dragged in by Sandy]
Sandy:[Taking SpongeBob and Patrick] Those two agents from the Zero Dryland Security just confiscated all my vacation slides, boys. Or so they think... [She pulls a tree trunk lever to activate a secret hideout] You see, [puts the two on two chairs. She goes to a copy of the vacation slides] Someone already made six copies.
[SpongeBob raises his hand]
Sandy: Yes, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: Who is this someone? Do we know him?
Sandy: By someone, I was implying me, SpongeBob. [Patrick raises his hand] Yes, Patrick?
Patrick: Can you not imply anymore? It's confusing.
[SpongeBob raises his hand again]
Sandy:[tying up SpongeBob and Patrick with rope] Okay, no more questions until the end of the slideshow. Okay? [they nod in agreement] Good. [shows the first slide] The first slide is of me getting some last-minute readings before I took off on my vacation. [switches to the next slide] And this is me giving the thumbs-up-goodbye for now salute. [shows the next slide] And this... [dreadfully] This is where a little square pal of mine decided to pay me a visit.
[transition to SpongeBob visiting Sandy]
SpongeBob:[walking to Sandy's house] ♪I'm ready to see Sandy. I'm ready to see Sandy. I'm ready to see Sandy [spinning] I'm ready to ring Sandy's doorbell♪ [rings the doorbell; suddenly, an extreme humming noise vibrates the ocean floor] Saaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnddddddddyyyyyy...! [a rocket emerges from beneath the ground] Whoa!
Sandy: What do you think of my moon wagon?
SpongeBob: Oh, Sandy. I'm sorry I activated it! How was I to know it was hooked up to your doorbell?
Sandy: Oh no, SpongeBob. That's what you call a "coincidence." I'm getting ready for my vacation!
SpongeBob: Where are you going?
Sandy: The moon! [SpongeBob gasps]
SpongeBob: You're going on a moon trip?!
Sandy: Yep! I'm all packed up and ready to go. Wanna help me…
SpongeBob: I'll be right back!
Sandy: ...load up the moon wagon? [sighs]
SpongeBob:[SpongeBob is at bakery] Morning, Mr. Bakerman! Oh, that's right, I'm sorry. I have to pick a number. [attempts to pull a ticket, but fails and gets tangled up]
Bakerman: Number 12.
SpongeBob: Yes, I'm Number 12!
Bakerman: What can I get for you today?
SpongeBob: I need a bon voyage sheet cake. [Bakerman brings out out sheet cake] Could you put yummy words on it? Hmmmmm, what would those yummy words be? I got it! "Have fun on the moon...". What rhymes with "moon"? Tune? Roon? Noon? Goon?
Bakerman: How about “loon?”
SpongeBob: I got it! "See you soon!”
Countdown:[SpongeBob heads back to Sandy’s dome with the cake. The rocket is a few seconds from takeoff] T-minus 12, 11, 10, 9, 8…
SpongeBob: No, Sandy! Wait! You can't go without your sheet cake! [grabs a hold of the ladder, but falls into the rocket] Whoa!
Sandy:[sees SpongeBob] SpongeBob? What in cold chicken and pickles are you doing in my ship?
SpongeBob:[panting, and out of breath] I went to get you a, so I went to the, and then I got you a, and then T-minus something, and…
Countdown: Launch commencing.
Sandy: Nevermind. Can't stop the countdown now. Better strap yourself down. Looks like you're going on a mooncation!
Sandy: Uh, I'm kinda busy here, SpongeBob. Gotta recalculate to account for the extra weight.
SpongeBob: Oh, I just wanted to show you the…
Sandy: for the afterburners! [activates afterburners; propels rocket further] What were you saying, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: Oh, I… brought you a “bon voyage” sheet cake.
Sandy: You can't bring regular food into space!
SpongeBob: Wha, wha, wha, why not?
Sandy: Because, as we leave Earth's gravity, everything becomes weightless, and any un-contained food will float off in all directions!
SpongeBob: Oh. Is that a bad thing?
Sandy: Only if it gets sucked into the reverse spatial linearity drive. [cake floats into the reverse spatial linearity drive. The rocket engine malfunctions and turns off] Ah nuts!
SpongeBob: Oops. Sorry Sandy.
Sandy:[presses "Toss" button, and gets dressed in a large space suit] Well, it's a good thing I've brought my special space suit designed for just this kind of situation! Now, try not to file anything else up while I'm saving our necks. [goes into space] Aha! There's our problem. [clears the cake out from the the reverse spatial linearity drive.] Eh, could've used more nuts. [comes back inside rocket] Okay. I've got her up and running, again. Now, can you please sit with your hands folded for a while, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: Roger that! Folding hands.
Sandy: Now, get ready for lunar module se…
SpongeBob:[folds hands into a bird] What do you think Sandy?
Sandy: Just don't touch anything while we separate.
Sandy:[detaches rocket from boosters] That looks like a good spot. [lands on the moon, sets camp up] Alright, SpongeBob. Now that our camp is set up, it's time for some moon crater boarding! [brings out boards]
SpongeBob: What's moon crater boarding?
Sandy: You ride these on that like this. [jumps on and rides her snowboard on the moon] Yeehaw! Right here is the Flip-a-dee-do-dah. [flips her board in midair] Right there is the classic Texas tail grab. [grabs tail, and twists it into the shape of Texas] And this I call the 7-20 Nut Drop. [spins and breaks an asteroid into an acorn and eats it] Munchie! And let's not forget my grandpappy's favorite: The Tour to Saturn. [lies down on Saturn's rings] Star gazer! Yeehaw! Nothing like extreme sports and zero gravity! Alright your turn.
SpongeBob: Oh gee Sandy. I don't know. This looks kinda scary.
Sandy: Oh, come on SpongeBob. You got this! It's a can of corn.
SpongeBob: I don't know what corn is, but I sure like cans. Alright, I'll give it a try. [jumps on board and floats off into space] Sandy, this doesn't seem right.
Sandy: Uh oh! Looks like SpongeBob's too light for lunar gravity. SpongeBob, grab a hold of this! [lassos asteroid to SpongeBob]
SpongeBob:[grabs onto asteroid] Ok. [the rock pulls SpongeBob to the moon surface. SpongeBob begins to surf the moon, but screams]
Sandy: Wow, SpongeBob! What do you call that trick? [SpongeBob keeps screaming] Interesting. Maybe you can teach me how to do a “Waaaaah!”
SpongeBob:[SpongeBob continues screaming, and begins to surf over a satellite] Hey, this is kind of fun! [leaps, and bounces off the satellite, damaging it]
Frankie Billy:[shifts to Patrick watching TV] Carol, your real father is… [TV goes out due to satellite damage]
Patrick: Hey! Who's Carol's real father?!
SpongeBob:[scene returns to SpongeBob] Watch this Sandy! [ties an asteroid to his helmet to hold him down] Alright. A no-look... let's see... a one-footed, tongue-out, flip, leg up… [accidentally smashes into rocket's fuel tank, making it leak] puncture into the side of the rocket.
Sandy: You did great, SpongeBob! But, you should call your trick the "no-look, one-footed, tongue-out, flip, leg up, puncture the fuel tank on the rocket.”
Sandy: Come on, SpongeBob. We gotta get while there's still enough fuel to make it home!
SpongeBob: Wait! I have to do something very important! [takes picture of himself “holding the earth”] There! [both go into the rocket, and head for earth] So, we are going to make it, aren’t we Sandy?
Sandy: If the fuel holds out, there's no reason to panic. [rocket fuel signs shows “Empty”. Rocket starts falling to earth] Without the engines, we've lost all control. We're coming in too steep!
SpongeBob: Is that bad?
Sandy:[unbuckles seatbelt] Only if you consider being consumed in a giant fireball “bad”.
SpongeBob: Well, in that case, I won’t… giant fireball?! [unbuckles seatbelt, but hits wall] Sandy, where are you going?
Sandy: 'm going to take this bull by the horns! [Lassos the nose of the rocket. Rocket begins to catch fire as it descends towards earth]
SpongeBob: Are we gonna get consumed in a giant fireball?
Sandy: Not if I can keep her nose up we aren't. Hang on! It's gonna get bumpy when we hit the atmosphere. [the rocket keeps falling at a faster rate. SpongeBob yells in terror] Yeehaw!
SpongeBob:[continues screaming] My goodness!
Sandy: Yeehaw! Yeehaw!!! [rockets crashes]
SpongeBob: Oh, oh my gosh! Sandy! Sandy, are you okay? [Sandy groans] Oh, Sandy. I'm sorry I ruined your vacation.
Sandy: Ruined? Oh heck no! That was the most fun I've had in a toad's age! Once I get my rocket fixed, you and me is heading to Mars. Now, let's go grab another one of them sheet cakes.