[The episode begins on another beautiful day at the Krusty Krab. Mr. Krabs is in his military hat and is holding a whip.]
Mr. Krabs: All right, Krusty crew, I want to remind you all that you're representing the Krusty Krab—the greasiest greasy spoon you'll ever have the privilege of serving!
[SpongeBob's face is painted red and is wearing a claw-shaped form hand with #1 on it.]
SpongeBob: Whoo! You tell 'em, Mr. Krabs! [rips off pants] Bring it around town! Yeah!
[Mr. Krabs whips SpongeBob's face. Squidward is wearing a smiling mask. Mr. Krabs whips him the mask off of Squidward as he appears to be sleeping.]
Squidward:[blubbers] Bring it around somewhere!
[Mr. Krabs jumps on the table.]
Mr. Krabs: Open the doors and let the consuming commence! I'll be in me office polishing yesterday's booty. [laughs]
[Mr. Krabs walks into his office.]
Squidward:[imitating Mr. Krabs] "I'll be in me office polishing yesterday's booty." [laughs]
[SpongeBob gasps at Squidward's imitation and laughs. Mr. Krabs pops out of the cash register.]
Mr. Krabs: I heard that, Mr. Squidward!
[SpongeBob hides in his hat.]
Squidward: It wasn't an insult, Mr. Krabs. It was a—a—a—a tribute. Haven't you ever heard of "imitation is the sincerest form of flattery"?
[SpongeBob's eyes peek out under his hat.]
Mr. Krabs: You trying to tell me that was a "complement"?
Squidward: Exactly. It's my homage to you and your love for money.
Mr. Krabs:[grumbles] Well, you got me there. I do love money. [giggles] Excellent observation, Mr. Squidward.
[Mr. Krabs dives into the cash register. SpongeBob comes out from hiding in his hat.]
Squidward: Oh, boy, that was a close one.
SpongeBob: Yes, it was a very close one, Squidward. Close and warm. [his eyes widen] Mr. Krabs was really flattered by your imitation.
Squidward: Already forgot about it.
[SpongeBob runs up to the window and looks at various people passing by the restaurant.]
SpongeBob: Imitation plus flattery equals happy people. [hums as he gets an idea]
[The scene changes to Tom with his kids sitting at a table. SpongeBob serves a plate of Krabby Patties to the kids.]
Tom: Whoa, okay. Everybody, come on now. Settle down, time to eat your patties.
[SpongeBob morphs his body to look like Tom.]
SpongeBob:[imitating Tom] Whoa, okay now. Everybody, settle down, time to eat your patties. [changes back to normal] Huh?
[The kids laugh, but Tom looks infuriated. However, he does like it.]
Tom: Wow, that's just like me! [laughs]
[SpongeBob takes a bow and walks off while Tom's kids continue to laugh.]
Tom:[angry] I said eat your patties!
[Tom pounds on the table and the kids frightfully eat their meals.]
Squidward: Hurry up, SpongeBob, I need two orders of Krabby Krust stat.
SpongeBob: No problem, Squidward, I'll get you those orders as soon as possible.
[SpongeBob morphs his body to look like Squidward.]
SpongeBob:[imitating Squidward] Or never, whichever comes first.
[Everyone laughs as Squidward walks into the kitchen.]
SpongeBob: Oh, swoon. That imitation stuff really works. Look out, world! [his faces morphs into a handsome man, and in a voice similar to the narrator from Powerpuff Girls] I'm gonna flatter your socks off! [his teeth glimmers]
[Patrick is outside the restaurant digging in a garbage can. He pulls out a partially eaten Krabby Patty.]
Patrick: Hmm. Nope. [throws away patty and pulls out a soda cup] Ah.
[Patrick eats the soda cup and SpongeBob sneaks up behind him through the front doors. SpongeBob giggles and morphs himself into Patrick.]
SpongeBob:[imitating Patrick] Hey, there, Patrick old buddy.
Patrick: What? Oh, hi, Patrick. What's shaking?
SpongeBob:[imitating Patrick] I'm gonna eat ice cream and go jellyfishing with my good buddy, SpongeBob.
Patrick: Sounds good to me, "me."
[SpongeBob morph back to normal.]
SpongeBob: Ah, it's just me, Patrick! Fooled ya! [laughs]
Patrick:[laughs] You can't fool me, "me." That's the worst SpongeBob impression I've ever seen.
SpongeBob:[laughs but then becomes confused] Wait, what?
[The scene changes to Sandy playing chess with Plankton outside the Chum Bucket. Plankton pushes the black rook to the next square.]
Plankton: Rook to king four.
[Plankton pushes the piece, groaning. The rook topples over and squashes him.]
[Sandy yanks and unsticks the piece off of him]
Sandy: Plankton, maybe we should play a game that's a little less dangerous. You're flatter than hammered horse hockey.
[Sandy, with a disgusted look on her face, pokes squished Plankton with her finger. SpongeBob pops up and morphs his body into Sandy.]
SpongeBob:[Imitating Sandy he leans over and crushes him with his artificial helmet.] Cattywampus, Plankton. You're just about the teeniest gal-dang critter I ever did see. Yee-haw!
[SpongeBob forms another head that resembles Plankton.]
SpongeBob:[imitating Plankton] And you are the fuzziest nut-eating scientist I've ever seen. [evil laugh]
SpongeBob:[imitating Sandy] I like to use science for good.
SpongeBob:[imitating Plankton] Really? I always use science for evil!
Sandy:[laughs as she claps] That is me to a Texas "T," SpongeBob! He nailed you too, Plankton!
Plankton: It was okay. He got my face right, but that voice is terrible.
[SpongeBob morphs back to normal.]
SpongeBob: Oh, those impressions are making everyone so happy! I can't stop doing them! I can't..I won't.
[SpongeBob morphs his body into Gary and meows like him.]
SpongeBob:[imitating the French Narrator as he reads the time card] 80,000 impressions later...
French Narrator: Would you please stop imitating me? It is starting to get very annoying.
[The scene changes to the Krusty Krab as SpongeBob, who morphed his body to look like Nathiel, serves a Krabby Patty to Nathiel.]
Nathiel Waters: Uh, can I have some extra napkins please?
SpongeBob:[imitating Nathiel] Oh, you want some napkins, please?
Nathiel Waters: Stop it! Stop imitating me! For the love of Neptune, shut your talented mouth! [runs out of the restaurant]
SpongeBob: Okay, bye. Yup, everybody still loves it. [sighs]
[SpongeBob morphs his body into Squidward.]
SpongeBob:[imitating Squidward] Are we having fun yet, Squidward Tentacles? [laughs as he walks into the kitchen]
Squidward: Oh, that's it! I can't stand the perfect impression of me anymore! I never thought I'd say this, but I'm tired of looking at myself. I quit! [throws his hat and leaves]
Sandy: Boy, SpongeBob is really getting out of control with his impression obsession.
[Mr. Krabs pops out of the cash register.]
Mr. Krabs: Right you are, Sandy. SpongeBob has lost touch with reality. I've seen it before. They call it: the "mocking mimicry madness."
[SpongeBob sneaks up behind with his body morphed into Mr. Krabs.]
SpongeBob:[imitating Mr. Krabs] The mocking mimicry madness. [laughs]
[Mr. Krabs screams and hides into the cash register.]
SpongeBob: Oh, oh, oh! [falls backwards]
Sandy: Huh! Oh.
[SpongeBob laughs. The scene changes to Patrick, Plankton, Squidward, Mr. Krabs and Sandy standing outside of SpongeBob's house.]
Sandy: All right, remember guys, this is an intervention, so we need to make sure that above all, SpongeBob knows how much we all care about him.
Plankton: Why don't we just destroy him and get it over with?
Squidward: Here here.
[Patrick grabs Plankton and Squidward and strangles them really hard.]
Patrick: You leave my best friend alone!
Plankton and Squidward:[muffled] It was just a suggestion!
Mr. Krabs: Spread out! All right, you scurvy dogs, SpongeBob needs us, and more importantly, I need him—to stop imitating me customers!
Sandy: Right guys, that's... almost... the spirit.
[Sandy rings the doorbell.]
SpongeBob: Oh, boy, someone's at the door! I can't wait to imitate 'em! [opens the door as his friends enter] Oh, hello, Patrick! And Sandy? And Squidward? And Mr. Krabs? Plankton too? Five at once, huh? Okay, here goes nothing.
[SpongeBob strains himself and morphs his body into five of his friends all at once.]
SpongeBob:[imitating his friends] Hi! Ahoy! Howdy! Greetings! Go away!
All:[creeped out] Ugh.
Sandy:[nervous] Hi, SpongeBob. We need to talk.
SpongeBob:[imitating his friends] Why sure! Aye! Love to! About what? Who cares?
Sandy: You know, it's okay to be yourself, SpongeBob.
SpongeBob:[struggles to get his body back to normal] I'm-a trying, Sandy, I'm-a trying!
Sandy: You can do it, SpongeBob, just concentrate, and it'll all come back to ya!
[SpongeBob takes a deep breath and struggles to revert himself to normal. His friends cringe in fear. SpongeBob's body morphs into various characters.]
SpongeBob:[imitating various characters] Good morning, Gary! Meow. Duh! Me money! [laughs] Karate chop! Ha! I went to college! I said eat your patties! [talks normal as his body is messed up] I can't do it! I'm a freak! A freak! [imitating Plankton] I'm a freak!
[SpongeBob, with his completely deformed face, runs out of his house, crying.]
Patrick: That went well!
[The scene changes to nighttime. SpongeBob is hiding in a dark cave where is body is morphed into an owl.]
SpongeBob: ♪Who?, Who?, Who?, Who? Who?, Who?, Who?, Who? Who... am I? [morphs into a question mark] Who am I? [morphs into a pineapple] I just can't remember. [morphs into Pearl] Who am I? [imitates Pearl] I just can't recall. [morphs into handsome man and imitates him] Who am I to sing this somber song? When you've got six heads, there's something wrong. [morphs into five of his friends] Who am I? [imitates his friends] Please tell me. [normal] Who am I? [imitates his friends] Do you know me? [morphs into a female fish] My name could be Clementine [morphs into Fred] or it could be Freddie. [morphs into two SpongeBobs] I just can't recognize myself. I don't know if I'm ready. [imitating his friends in a barber shop quintet] I'm ready! [normal] Who am I? [morphs into a male fish] I have a right to know. [normal] Who am I? Am I friend... [morphs into Plankton and imitates him] or foe? [normal] I have so many features. It makes it hard to tell. I don't know what my first name is. But my faces ring a bell. [imitates Squidward] Who am I? [imitates Mr. Krabs] Who am I? [imitates Patrick] Who am I? [imitates Plankton] Who am I? [normal] Who am I? [phone rings] Hello-o-o?♪
Caller: Hello. To whom am I speaking?
SpongeBob: ♪I... don't... kno-o-ow!♪
[As SpongeBob's song ends, his face shrivels.]
Mr. Krabs: The salty tear trail leads right in here.
Sandy: There he is!
[SpongeBob groans as his friends run up to him.]
Sandy: Are you all right, SpongeBob? How many fingers am I holding up?
[SpongeBob groans and morphs into a letter B.]
Patrick: Good, SpongeBob! I had the same answer.
Sandy: I know you're in there somewhere, SquarePants!
[SpongeBob morphs into a telephone.]
SpongeBob: We're sorry, the person you are calling—SpongeBob SquarePants—has been disconnected or is no longer in service.
Sandy: Okay, guys, SpongeBob imitates whoever he hears, so we've all got to imitate him to help him remember who he is. [pulls out a paintbrush with yellow paint] This should help!
[Sandy paints yellow paint on Mr. Krabs.]
Mr. Krabs: Hey!
[Sandy paints yellow paint on Squidward and Patrick.]
Patrick:[rubs himself] Mmm! Mmm!
[Sandy paints yellow paint on herself. Plankton tries to run but Sandy catches him.]
Sandy: Ah! Hold still, you little rascal!
[Sandy dips Plankton into a bucket of yellow paint. Plankton spits out the paint.]
Plankton:[sarcastically] What a great idea. [spits out paint] Ugh!
Sandy:[imitating SpongeBob] I'm a square and yellow critter! [laughs]
Patrick:[imitating SpongeBob] I like cooking with lard! [laughs]
Mr. Krabs:[imitating SpongeBob] Mr. Krabs is the best boss in the whole ocean! [snickers] Oop! Sorry, I mean— [laughs like SpongeBob] Uh—
Plankton:[imitating SpongeBob] I forgot the secret Krabby Patty formula, Mr. K. Would you remind me again?
Mr. Krabs:[imitating SpongeBob] Sure, SpongeBob, I got it right— [normal] Oh, no, you don't, Plankton!
[Mr. Krabs smashes Plankton with the bottle.]
Mr. Krabs: That was a pretty good impression, though.
[SpongeBob's body is becoming much more messed up than before.]
Sandy:[groans] It's not working, fellers! We need to combine our efforts and do an impression of SpongeBob all at the same time! Okay, all together now!