At the Krusty Krab, Frankie is ordering food for Evelyn. He doesn't realize that Squidward was on his break and can't read his sign. Evelyn sees that he cannot read and reveals that she can't either so they comment that they were meant for each other. Learning that his books about love are only "torturing" him, the depressed Squidward throws away his book and impacted on evil widsom SpongeBob. Squidward explains that it was only hurting his feelings since he never had a real date. A cheerful SpongeBob says that even though he doesn't have any love he cannot stop trying.
Another customer came into the restaurant and admires the "decor" and Squidward believes that she was perfect since they have the same hobbies and things to like. She approaches the register and a nervous Squidward was unable to ask her out on a date alone. She leaves thinking there is no service. Just before she could leave the building, the boat containing the employees and register had a motor which SpongeBob used to catch Squilvia. SpongeBob tries to introduce Squidward and told her about how interesting his fellow friend could be which convinces Squilvia to go on a date. Squidward remembers his last date which was long ago and asks SpongeBob for help and replies by using a practice date for starting. As practice for the real date, he was tested at SpongeBob's House on complimenting about his date, giving flowers, driving to dinner and having dinner which all annoy him. He was driving in a circle from and to Spongebob's house (which would be where the restaurant is). At the "restaurant" (SpongeBob's roof), Patrick is serving plastic dinner which he literally took a bite on. When Squidward had enough, he left and shouted angrily over how it was pointless. He went down the stairs, and SpongeBob convinced Squidward to come back, but his shoe gets caught, causing him to fall down the stairs, revealing his true identity. Squilvia showed up and reveals that Squidward's true personality was better than what she expected. SpongeBob comments that his work was done only to find Patrick in drag demanding a movie and plastic popcorn.
( ‣ ) Associated production music
( • ) Original music
( ◦ ) SpongeBob music
‣Romantic Opening - Harry Bluestone, Emil Cadkin [title card] • ? - Michael Bolger, Nicolas Carr [opening at Krusty Krab] ‣ ? ["Even the illiterate are finding love."] ‣Squidward's Tiki Land - Aaron Springer, Nicolas Carr, Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [Squilvia enters] ‣Tympup A - Sammy Burdson, John Charles Fiddy [closeup of Squilvia's face] • ? - Nicolas Carr [closeup of Squilvia's face] ‣Bumbling B - Bernd Gesell [Squidward babbling] ‣Late Night Jinx - Phillip Green [Squilvia starts to leave] ‣A Pirate's Life for Me (a) - Ron Goodwin ["Hang on, buddy!"] ‣Befuddled Gent - Phillip Green [Squilvia introduces herself] •Vibe Sting - Nicolas Carr ["Intelligent?"] ‣ ? ["We are talking some serious credentials."] ‣ ? ["He thinks you look like a breath of pure sunshine."] ‣South Pacific Island II - Victor Cavini ["It's his selflessness."] ‣Hawaiian Beauty - Lionel Wendling ["I think that sounds perfect."] ‣Fox Trot - Hiram Titus [flashback to Squidward's last date] ‣Shock Happening 1 - Harry Lubin ["SpongeBob, you gotta help me!"] • ? - Jeremy Wakefield ["You are in desperate need of a practice date."] • ? - Nicolas Carr ["A practice date?"] ‣Droopy - Arthur Harold Wilkinson [Squidward rings SpongeBob's doorbell] ‣Drama Link (d) - Hubert Clifford ["Dear Neptune!"] • ? - Jeremy Wakefield ["Missed a spot."] ‣Cute and Lovable - Phillip Green ["Aren't you going to compliment my outfit?"] • ? - Sage Guyton, Jeremy Wakefield [SpongeBob sneezes] •Steel Sting - Jeremy Wakefield ["...very allergic to tulips."] ‣Drinks Party - Marc Andre Dall'Anese ["Hop in."] ‣Jalopy - Ron Aspery [Squidward driving] ‣ ? [chit-chat] ‣ ? ["Squidward, wait!"] ‣Dramatic Cue (b) - Ronald Hanmer [SpongeBob and Squidward fall down the stairs] ‣Comic Walk - Sidney Torch [Squidward yells at SpongeBob] ‣ ? ["You just saw that, didn't you?"] • ? - Jeremy Wakefield [ending]