Plankton:[interrupting] There's nothing wrong with Chum Bucket fare. Why look! Here's a fresh batch of a delicious new chum sauce. It's called Spicy Chum Surprise. [Shows sauce melting through pan and onto floor where it then starts to melt through the floor][Pause] Delectable!
Karen:[sarcastically] Oh, I'm sure it'll be a huge success!
Plankton: Sorry, no time for your senseless chatter. I've got a customer to attend to!
Billy: Okay, so what about the Krabby Kola?
Plankton: We don't serve Krabby Kola, we carry Bucket Bubbler and Chum Cherry Blast.
Billy: Okay, well then can I just make sure I get those Krabby Fries with extra Krabby Sauce?
Plankton:[frustrated] Uggghhhh! How many times must I say it!? We don't carry Krabby Fries, we don't carry Krabby Kola, we don't carry Krabby Sauce, and we don't carry Krabby Patties!!! So if you want any of those things you're gonna have to go to the Krusty Krab which is located directly across the street!"
Billy: Okay, thanks for the directions.
Plankton:[annoyed] Any time. What is wrong with people?!
Plankton: Honestly, I don't think anyone in Bikini Bottom would know a decent meal if it looked them right in the eye and said, "Hello! I'm a decent meal, wonderful to meet you! Please pay money for me and then put me in your mouth so your old pal Plankton doesn't lose everything he's spent his entire life working for!"
Karen: Ya, if anyone did order one of your meals it probably would look them in the eye.
Plankton: You know Karen, sometimes I wonder if you're here to help me run the Chum Bucket or just to make me feel like I'm two inches tall. [Notices ruler right next to where he is standing showing he is indeed two inches tall]
Karen: Maybe in heels. If it wasn't for me, you probably wouldn't even remember to blink!
Plankton: Oh come on! When we first met, you were little more than a jumbled mass of diodes and wires. I made you what you are today! [Pause] Literally! So don't think you couldn't be replaced in a heartbeat! Ow!
Karen: What's the matter?
Plankton: My eye is burning and I don't know why!
Plankton: Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me. Now where was I!?
Karen: You were threatening to replace me.
Plankton: Oh yeah! I don't need you! I can make a whole army of computers that might actually help me steal the formula!
Karen: Oh pa-lease.
Plankton: I'll show you woman! [Marches away]
Plankton: Oh Karen!
[Shows Karen watching computer movie]
Karen: Now what!?
Plankton: Could you come here for a moment?
[Karen rolls in to the kitchen]
Karen: What do you want?
Plankton: Feast your, uh, screen on this. [Presses red button]
[Contraption rolls out]
Karen: That’s my replacement!? It’s a toaster!
Plankton: Ha ha ha, that, my dear, is a T-119A Compumatic, the finest of its kind.
T-119A Compumatic: Good morning sir
Plankton: Good morning T-119A.
[robot short circuits]
Plankton: They're supposed to do that. Next, Behold! The Noxious Enterprises Super SPU-31 Liquid-Cooled Mobile Processing Unit, a mind staggering combination of both power! And refinement.
[Robot tries to come through the doorway but can't, making the glass top break][Water squirts everywhere]
Karen:[Sarcastically] That'll help you get the formula!
Plankton: And now Karen, the piesta – resistance. [shows robot] Have you ever witnessed such marvelous machinery?
Karen: It sorta just looks like an old hair dryer taped to the back of a miniature windmill.
Plankton: I can see how someone of your level of technical knowledge would think that Karen, but in actuality what you are looking at is... oh, right.
Karen: I don't recall you ever having reason to own a hair dryer Plankton.
Plankton: Okay here we go!!! Are you going to make me get the picture down again!!!???
Karen: What picture!?
[Plankton walks down hallway and takes picture off the wall]
[Shows Karen wedding picture of the two of them. Plankton has a full head of hair]
Plankton: You see! Plenty of reason to be using a hair dryer.
Karen: Why are we even talking about this?
Plankton: Because you were the one that said...
[interrupted by torch sounding noises]
Karen: What's going on!?
Plankton: Dear Neptune!
[Shows robots attacking each other]
[Plankton tries to separate robots]
Plankton: Karen, do something! Quick! They're tearing each other apart! Just press a button or something!
[Karen presses the red button Plankton had been using]
Plankton: Not that one!
[Plankton screams as a panel in SPU-31 flips open to reveal a hammer. It immediately targets Plankton and smashes him 3 times. Plankton walks back up to Karen, smushed.]
Karen: Well, it's good to see that that strategy didn't fall flat!
Plankton: You know Karen, with you around, I'm beginning to wonder how I'm still alive.
Karen: Ohhh, so it's my fault is it?
Plankton: That's right! Now it's all clear! It's you that's been holding me back! In fact, if it weren't for your constant stifling, I'd have the whole world running for the safety of their mommies!!
Karen: You and your crack team of robots, huh?
[Shows robots again beating each other up]
Plankton: Well maybe I could iron out a few bugs, but then you'll see just how much I need you! [looks around] Karen? What's this? [Sees note on the ground] It's words on paper. It says: Dear Plankton, I've logged onto another network. I just can't go into sleep mode at night knowing that you'll continue blaming me for all of your failures. Anyway, you're a grown single celled organism, and allowed to make your own syntax errors. Nice knowing you, Karen. "Dah! who needs her!? Not me! I'm going to steal that Krabby Patty formula from Mr. Krabs once and for all. And then we'll see who's made the error. [Laughs Menacingly] Ow! [looks at note] P.S., don't forget to blink. Oh yeah.
Plankton: Okay team, listen up. We're on our own now so we don't have anything holding us back. Now I know you all look upon me kindly since I am your creator, but the last thing the Chum Bucket needs is, if were going to be victorious, is a bunch of soft, uh, software. Does everybody understand?
[All robots but one make their noise of recognition]
Plankton: I said, does everybody understand!?!?!?
[Last robot makes noise of recognition]
Plankton: All right, then let's do this! T-119A to position! [Shows robot fly through the air] SPU-31 to position! Command Module to position!
[Shows Plankton in the command module]
Plankton: Heh heh heh. Now let's see Krabs stop this. I'll show him. I'll show them all!!!
[Plankton laughs menacingly again]
Perch Perkins: This just in, a diabolical albeit half-hazardously, thrown together machine is attacking Bikini Bottom and is headed straight for the Krusty Krab!!! [click]
[Squidward turns off Krusty Krabs TV]
Squidward: Why is the local news always such rubbish!?
SpongeBob: Hey, Squidward look! I figured out how to get my mop wet without dipping it in the bucket.
Squidward: SpongeBob, nobody cares about... [interrupted by rumbling and shaking]
[Planktons robot silhouette is seen in the dust approaching the Krusty Krab]
[Plankton laughs menacingly]
[Propeller from his windmill hits his head knocking off his hat]
Plankton: Hey! Krabs, I wanna see you.
[Mr. Krabs ducks down in the window]
Mr. Krabs: Okay boy, get out there. [Throws SpongeBob outside towards Plankton's robot]
SpongeBob: Um... hello... what do you want robot thing, sir? [Plankton walks out on a boardwalk] Oh, hey Plankton! What are you doing here?
Plankton: I'm here for the secret formula you twit! Now I want you to go in there and tell Krabs that if he doesn't turn over the formula to me, that he'll be subjected to utter annihilation at my... Are you getting this?
SpongeBob: Uhhhhh, uuh uuh.
Plankton: Uuhhhh, moron! Okay, I'll make it simple: Krabs give me secret formula or I bring big boom boom to the Krusty Krab. Got it?
SpongeBob:[Writing on clipboard] Krabs give me secret formula or... uhhh... what was that other thing?
Plankton:[Frustrated] Uhhh! Forget it! [Marches back into his command module, drops SpongeBob] Bring on the Boom Boom!
[Robot starts marching toward the Krusty Krab]
Mr. Krabs: Battle stations men!!! Here he comes!
SpongeBob: We're all doomed, we're all doomed, we're all doomed, we're all doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, we're all doomed, we're all doomed, we're all doomed, we're all doomed!!!
Squidward:[Walking out of the "Krusty Krab"] Later.
[Robot marching again with Plankton][You notice that the extension cord that is powering the robot is about to be unplugged]
[Robot stops only feet from the Krusty Krab]
Plankton: Hey, what gives?
[SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs emerge from the Krusty Krab. Mr. Krabs laughed at Plankton's failed attempt and the two walked away. ]
Plankton:[Crying] Oh curse you cruel fate. Once again, you've left me covered in the sticky goo of my own folly. Only this time, I'm all alone. [More crying]
Plankton:[Looks up and sees "Karen"] Karen! You've come back to me!
Karen: Actually, I just came to get my keyboard.
Plankton: Oh, I knew you couldn't stay away, I knew it!
Karen:[sigh] Let me guess, another failure?
Plankton: What you gonna do, machines these days, right? Umm, listen sweetie, I'm sorry about what I said. Truth is, I could never replace you honey-bunch. Lets go home hun?
Plankton: Hey, I could whip us up a little dinner, what do ya say?