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Extreme Spots (transcript)

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Transcript Information
S09E01A-Extreme-Spots-Titlecard
General
Season №: 9
Episode №: 179a
Airdate: July 21, 2012
Chronology
Previous: "Hello Bikini Bottom!"
Next: "Squirrel Record"
List of episode transcripts

This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Extreme Spots" from season nine, which aired on July 21, 2012.

  • SpongeBob: A little more sand. Pat, Pat, Pat. Pat, Pat, Patrick! Check it out. An exact replica of the Krusty Krab. One sandy patty. Extra grit.
  • Patrick: [gulps] A bit dry and flavorless. I'll take two dozen.
  • Fred: Hey everyone! The Drastic Radicals Are Doing Extreme Tricks on Sand Mountain! 
  • [everyone runs to Sand Mountain]
  • SpongeBob: Let's check it out!
  • Patrick: Um, could you give me a hand?
  • SpongeBob: Sure thing, buddy. [Patrick whistles and Patrick's body comes and places his head on his body]
  • [about Sand Mountain excited chatter]
  • Patrick: I can't see anything.
  • SpongeBob: Allow me.
  • [heard engine revs, crowd gasps]
  • Johnny Krill: Yeahhh!!! [laughs]
  • SpongeBob: Wow!
  • Patrick: Whoa!
  • SpongeBob: Whoa!
  • Patrick: Wow!
  • SpongeBob: Wow!
  • Patrick: Wow!
  • SpongeBob: Whoa!
  • Patrick: Whoa!
  • [bugle call]
  • SpongeBob: [gasps] Look out!
  • [Not Dead Ted laughs]
  • SpongeBob: Someone help that little old lady!
  • Grand Maul Granny: Help yourselves, himrods!
  • [explosion, screaming together, engine revs]
  • Narrator: Johnny Krill! Not Dead Ted! [Grand Maul Granny laughs] Grand Moul Granny! [explosion] Drastic... Radicals! [explosion] THE DRASTICALS!!!
  • Patrick: Did you see that?
  • SpongeBob and Patrick: What was that?
  • British Gentleman: Why, those are the Dwastic Wadicals, the number one practitioners of extweme spowts. [sips tea]
  • SpongeBob and Patrick: Extreme what?
  • British Gentleman: Extweme spowts.
  • Patrick: Extreme spots? Well, that's no fair. You're already covers in extreme spots. Ooh. Hold on a second. [hive buzzing, Patrick screaming, electricity crackling] Okay, let's do meet our new heroes.
  • [The Drasticals laughing]
  • SpongeBob: We want to join your extreme spots team, as you can see, we're also covered head to toe in the most extreme of spots.
  • [Drasticals laugh]
  • Johnny: It's extreme sports, not spots. So you wanna be a Drastical. Let's see what you got, little dude.
  • SpongeBob: No problemo. I guess you just hop up like this...[revs engines, motorcycle drives off with his hands] Hey! Come back! [SpongeBob chases after it, motorcycle goes faster] Heeeeyyy!! [Runs the other way, motorcycle picks him up and he screams as he goes through sand dunes. Motorcycle stops, SpongeBob faints]
  • Granny: [Chuckling, to Patrick] You're turn, fat boy!
  • Patrick: Hey! How'd we get up here? [Patrick is pushed off cliff, hits several rocks then falls off mountain]
  • Johnny: Our sports are too extreme for you dudes. Maybe we should start you two on something easier. What games do you dudes like to play?
  • SpongeBob: Ooh, I know. How 'bout a little something called Jump rope?
  • Johnny: Jumprope, eh? Demonstrate.
  • SpongeBob: Ready Patrick? On your mark, get set, jump rope!
  • Patrick: Extreme! [starts jumping] Hey, who's holding the other end?
  • SpongeBob: I am of course. [Pan to the right] Hi Patrick!
  • Patrick: D'uh. [blows harmonica, starts singing] My best friend is SpongeBob, he has a square head, I try on his clothes while he's asleep in bed.
  • SpongeBob: Yeah! What?
  • Patrick: That's weird, my face is leaking.
  • SpongeBob: You're face isn't leaking. You're just sweating from all the exercise.
  • Patrick: EXERCISE?! [stops] Eww, I didn't sign up for this! [faints]
  • SpongeBob: Extreme!
  • Johnny: Dude that was NOT EXTREME. Let the Drasticals show you how it's done. Grab it Granny [throws one end of jump rope, Granny bites end of rope, Ted makes a somersault and lands on rope with his tongue, jumps back into the air]
  • Ted: Drasticals! Whoo! Yeah! [Lands and jumps over rope to the point where he steams up]
  • Johnny: Kick it up a notch!
  • [Ted sets aflame and shoots into the air]
  • SpongeBob and Patrick: Ooooh.
  • Ted: YEAH!! [plane hits him, he falls face first into ground and burns to a crisp]
  • Johnny: Yeah! See, extreme sports should be explosive! BOOM!
  • SpongeBob: Explosive, huh? I know just the thing! [dips bubble wand and blows bubble. Bubble pops] BOOM! [SpongeBob and Patrick make several explosion sounds] Impressed?
  • Drasticals: No.
  • Johnny: Look dudes, to be extreme you gotta go bigger. Show 'em Drasticals! [Granny climbs huge bottle of bubble soap, dips huge wand and puts it in front of a ramp] Watch this! [Rides motorcycle into bubble, speeds into town and knocks over a building. Bubble pops and he gets crushed] Extreme. [Tunnels back, hops out of the ground] Now that's how you do extreme! You understand?
  • SpongeBob: I think I do. Is fighting extreme?
  • Johnny: Fighting is totally extreme.
  • [Scene opens in wrestling ring.]
  • Patrick: I want a clean fight. I don't wanna see any trash laying around. [Rings his head instead of bell. SpongeBob tries to punch a pillow, spins to the edge, launched back into pillow which land on his head] Oohh...We give up! Fling [Waves towel and throws at SpongeBob] That was close.
  • Johnny: Not so fast, that's not fighting. Stand aside [Stomps SpongeBob and Patrick out of ring] I'll show you how it's done! [Slams into pillow, puts into washing machine, sets it on wash]
  • SpongeBob: Noo! It's dry-clean only!
  • [Johnny smashes machine open, punches pillow out of ring]
  • Pillow: Avenge me.
  • SpongeBob: Brutal.
  • Mattress: Charlie! [Jumps into ring and smashes Johnny, then does it again 6 times more]
  • Patrick: Even more brutal!
  • Johnny: Now that was extreme, dudes. You think you're starting to get it?
  • SpongeBob and Patrick: Oh yeah.
  • Johnny: So what else you got?
  • SpongeBob: Well there is one sport that Patrick's an expert at.
  • Patrick: Dumpster diving!
  • [Patrick pushes dumpster, climbs it, and jumps in. SpongeBob cheers. Patrick sinks in and pops out, coughing up some trash.]
  • Johnny: That's not extreme.
  • Patrick: [Spits out old toothbrush] How revolting. [Brushes teeth with it]
  • Johnny: Okay, that's kinda extreme. Not bad, but the Drasticals will show you how it's done. [Ted brings in a ladder with diving board and Granny on top. Ladder is set higher]
  • Granny: Okay artificial hip, don't fail me now. [Jumps into dumpster and chuckles. Johnny dumps her and trash into a garbage truck and crushes them with a compactor. Trash comes out a square shape and Granny pops out] EXTREME!
  • Patrick: That is one tough elderly person.
  • Johnny: Dude, that was awesome! What other crazy sports do you dudes play?
  • SpongeBob: Well, there is a very extremely extreme sport we play if you're up to it.
  • [At Jellyfish Fields, SpongeBob and Patrick chase after jellyfish]
  • Patrick: Hey, where are the Drasticals? [They feel ground shaking] Here they come!
  • [Johnny catches jellyfish on motorcycle, Ted in the air, and Granny riding them like a tidal wave]
  • SpongeBob: Wow!
  • Patrick: Amazing!
  • Johnny: Jellyfishing, yeah...[Jellyfish flies into his mouth and stings him, Ted flies into huge jellyfish and burns, thrown into Johnny and Granny and they get caught in an explosion]
  • Johnny: [Covered in stings] Dudes, now we get it! These spots are way extreme!
  • Ted: And itchy!
  • British Gentleman: As you can see, extweme spowts are the direct bi-product of the most extweme spowts.
  • Patrick: Who is that guy?

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