Paramedic(mentioned as "some guy in an ambulance")
Human audience (debut)
Owner of the white sedan (mentioned)
Squidward is playing his clarinet awfully and someone knocks on his door. He goes to answer the door and sees a doctor who asks if he has a dying animal on the premises. Squidward does not care about this and slams the door. He gets a call from his high school classmate, Squilliam Fancyson, who is very rich and successful and has succeeded in everything that Squidward failed in (such as music). He tells Squidward about the dying animal incident, shocking Squidward because Squilliam is calling him. Squilliam taunts him by saying that he heard Squidward was a cashier, so Squidward taunts him back by asking how his unibrow is (with Squilliam telling him that it is big and valuable). He smugly tells Squidward that his band is playing at the Bubble Bowl (shocking Squidward with Squilliam saying that he is living Squidward's dreams). He tells Squidward that he cannot make it and asks him to substitute them with his band, believing (correctly) that he does not have one. When Squidward tries to say that he cannot do it, he smugly asks if it is because he has no band. However, Squidward refuses to let Squilliam think that he is better than him and denies this, accepting the offer. Squilliam still believes Squidward will not do well saying that he hopes the crowd will bring ibuprofen. Squidward decides that he needs to assemble a large marching band quickly (laughing because he said he needed to "drum up" a band), and does so by putting up flyers. The band is comprised of various Bikini Bottomites, including all the other main characters. During their one week of training, however, the band consistently plays badly and fails to improve at all.
After renting instruments on the day of the first practice, Squidward heads to the auditorium (arriving late because the rental clerk at the music store "didn't know an oboe from an elbow," with his joke causing him to laugh again). Hearing everyone speaking randomly, he calms them down. He first asks if anyone has played an instrument before. Plankton asks if instruments of torture count and Squidward says that they do not. Patrick asks if mayonnaise and horseradish are instruments, with Squidward telling him they are not. Since no one has played an instrument before, Squidward decides to assign them himself, saying that it is okay if no one has any experience and he is able to because he has "enough talent for all of them" (causing everyone to go silent as they do not believe he has any). After assigning the instruments, he decides to conduct them. He firsts tell people to repeat his notes and then asks the brass section to play. They do so badly, and he thinks it is good. The wind section, then plays badly, which he thinks is also good. However, it fails when he asks the drummers to play when they blow on the sticks, pinning him to the wall (as the brass and wind sections required blowing). Squidward says that it is too bad that that didn't kill him, and tries again.
Squidward tells everyone that they should just try stepping the rhythm first, and gets everyone to line up in rows of five. SpongeBob asks if it is the part where they start kicking, and Squidward tells him that's a chorus line. Patrick misinterprets this, saying he wants to do some kicking and kicks Sandy. Angry, she chases after him and they go outside. Off screen, the fight continues and Patrick screams. He comes back saying that the owner of the white sedan left their car lights on. He walks in to reveal that Sandy got his head stuck in his trombone.
On day two, the band practices a march. Squidward tells everyone to keep on moving and tell the flag-twirlers to twirl the flags faster. He then tells them to go even faster, and they spin the flags so fast that they end up flying into the air and dying in a blimp crash. The band begins to mourn and play Taps, except for Squidward, who just curls up on the ground, disappointed. On day three, Squidward asks Plankton to show him the harmonica solo he has been practicing, but he becomes exhausted from having to run from one place to another since he is very tiny and collapses from exhaustion.
On the last day of practice, Squidward says if everyone plays loud, they will be good, but instead, they play so badly and loudly that the windows break, Squidward's face is deformed beyond recognition and his baton breaks. Squidward changes the idea of loud to really quiet, causing a heckler to get upset, saying "We wouldn't sound so bad if some of us didn't try to play with big, meaty, claws!," insulting Mr. Krabs. Mr. Krabs gets angry they threaten each other to the point where they are about to fight. SpongeBob tries to break it up, but a woman says that the "talking cheese" is now trying to preach to them, and everyone gets into a huge brawl, smashing the instruments on each other and hurting people offensively, causing the band to break up. At this time, it is already 10 o' clock and the band decides to go home as practice is over but they notice a grieving Squidward, who watched them all, at the door. He expresses his disappointment in all of them saying that they took his one chance at happiness and crushed into tiny bite-sized pieces and that he expected more of them. He concludes that he is a loser for expecting more from them too and he would tell Squilliam the band died in a marching accident, and goes home, ending with "Thanks for nothing" (to which Patrick replies "You're welcome") to grieve over his failure. However, SpongeBob convinces them to go through with the performance for Squidward's sake. He says that if Squidward were someone who did something nice for them (such as the fireman that saved Evelyn's son Jimmy and the guy in the ambulance that rescued Larry when his heart gave out from all his tanning pills) they would never forget then maybe they should do something for him. He takes command of their training.
On the day of the concert, Squidward passes by the Bubble Bowl wondering what he is going to tell Squilliam and saying that he hopes he doesn't find out. However, he sees Squilliam is at the Bubble Bowl waiting to see Squidward's failure mid-sentence, shocking him and causing him to scream out the rest of the sentence. Squilliam asks Squidward where his band was and he claims that his band died like he said he would. However, Squidward's band shows up with Squilliam asking what they are and Squidward turning around to see them, much to his shock and dismay. He is forced to go through with the performance. They enter a large glass dome, which rises up and takes them to a live-action football field for a team called the Showboats, complete with human fans. SpongeBob thinks it is a toxic waste dump, with Mr. Krabs thinking he is going to be sick. Squidward turns his head away from the band before they begin, assuming that the performance will be a disaster, but the band is tremendously successful, starting off with trumpets from a marching band sequence but eventually descending into a rock ballad of David Glen Eisley's "Sweet Victory." Squilliam goes into a state of shock and faints from a heart attack and gets taken away by paramedics, leaving Squidward to celebrate his "Sweet Victory." He throws away the baton and just enjoys his moment with the band, jumping into the air and then having a freeze-frame effect applied to him while he is in the air.
In the Croatian dub, the episode name is "Kalamarkov Bend" translating to "Squidward's Band."
The flyer for Squidward's band says: Looking to add fulfillment to your dull, dull life? Then become a part of the greatest musical sensation ever to hit Bikini Bottom and be forever adored by thousands of people you don't know. Not to mention free refreshments! Practice begins tonight, 8:30 sharp.
The ending is similar to the 1st movie: someone happy jumps in the air and screen freezes.
The Bubble Bowl "real life" crowd is footage used from a USFL Memphis Showboats vs. Tampa Bay Bandits game.
During Day Two when the band is marching down the street, they are actually doing a rendition of Semper Fidelis, regarded as the official marching song of the U.S. Marine Corps.
This episode came packaged in a PVD in black and white with the VideoNow personal video player by Hasbro. The episode was later released in color with "The Secret Box."
In the Latin American Spanish version the title card is called: "Squidward's Band Geek."
SpongeBob's eager face was used in the online game "Reef Rumble."
SpongeBob's eager face is also a famous internet meme.
Patrick's line from this episode, "Is mayonnaise an instrument?" has become a famous internet meme.
This also applies to Harold's line "Big, meaty, claws!"
Several clips of this episode have been used in various old SpongeBob music videos on YouTube.
On Nick.com's official SpongeBob site, the original episode video description stated that Squidward only has minutes to put together a band for the Bubble Bowl, yet the band actually has four days to train. It might be referring to the length of the episode.
In the Japanese version of this episode, the French Narrator and the announcer in the stadium are not heard.
In Latin America, during the day one training, the line where SpongeBob interferes Squidward after he asks people to stand in rows of five saying "Is this the part where we start kicking?" Squidward's response was changed. In English, he replies "No SpongeBob, that's a chorus line" (Which in Spanish would translate to "No SpongeBob, esa es una linea de coro"), while in the Latin American version, he replies "No SpongeBob, you think this is Karate?" (Which in Spanish translates to "No SpongeBob, ¿crees que esto es Karate?"). This change could have been made in order to not confuse young viewers, since it is likely that most of them do not have any sort of music compositional knowledge. However, this is countered by the fact that in the Latin American version, while asking the drum group to repeat the line from his clarinet, instead of saying "Drums" ("Tambores" in Spanish), he says "Percussion" ("Percusion" in Spanish), which is a far less common denomination of the instrument.
In the Polish dub, the episode's title is "Kapela Skalmara" translating to "Squidward's Band."
During the song, when SpongeBob is pointing and Sandy is in the background, SpongeBob is wearing a ring that looks like the friendship ring from this episode's sister episode, "The Secret Box."
This episode and "The Secret Box," were the last to air before the 9/11 attacks, which occurred just 4 days after when both of the episodes aired.
Running Gag: Patrick kicking Sandy making her beat up Patrick with a trombone first and then a trumpet.
All of the main characters appear in this episode except Gary the Snail.
This episode takes place before or after season 1's "Naughty Nautical Neighbors" because in that episode SpongeBob tries to play a string bass.
It is unknown how there could be a white sedan underwater since boats are shown as cars in the SpongeBob series. However, the boat could be a sedan type of boat.
When the band is shown turning from above, Pearl's nose is unreasonably big and covers several people.
The Bubble Bowl is a parody of the Super Bowl.
Part of Pearl's skirt is gone when SpongeBob talks to Evelyn and Larry, but reappears in the next scene, and then disappears again.
During the band's performance of "Sweet Victory" when the main cast (minus Mrs. Puff and Plankton) is shown, Mr. Krabs is playing a purple keytar, but during the panning the keytar is green.
During the full band scene, all of the main cast moves in some way but Mr. Krabs doesn't move at all.
When everyone in the room is talking, SpongeBob and Patrick are sitting next to each other. However, when Patrick asks if mayonnaise is an instrument and when he says "Kicking!? I want to do some kicking!," he is sitting next to Sandy.
Then, after getting beaten by Sandy, Patrick returns to a third seat.
Throughout the scenes of the rehearsals, the characters constantly change instruments.
Mr. Krabs asks when will they get free food even though the flyer actually mentioned free refreshments.
When Squidward says that he really expected better of them, Nancy's skin was green instead of pink.
When everyone says "blah blahs," they all say it normally, but the closed captions show musical notes for this part, as if they were singing.
The entire reason that Squidward has a band is because Squilliam could not make it. However, he shows up anyway meaning he could make it. So, Squidward did not have to make a band.
It is possible, if not likely, that Squilliam lied just to publicly humiliate Squidward in front of the crowd.
Patrick's trombone has valves on it, a feature uniquely absent from trombones.
When Squidward says "That's his eager face," his mouth is somewhat out of sync with the animation.
When Squidward asks Plankton how the harmonica solo is going, the harmonica is not on the chair. A second later, it is on the chair.
The saxophone is a woodwind instrument, but when Squidward tells the brass section to play, Harold can be seen playing a saxophone.
When Squidward tells the woodwind section to play, one of the players is playing a brass instrument.
When it is day four, all the seats are missing.
Squidward may have moved the chairs between the end of day three and the beginning of day four.
In the shot where Mr. Krabs asks, "When do we get the free food?," Sandy is sitting next to him. Two seats behind Mr. Krabs is Frank. Part of him is shown, but the part that should be shown in Sandy's helmet is not there. It is not a trick with lighting because the part of Fred, who is sitting behind Mr. Krabs, that is in Sandy's helmet is shown.
When Fred says "Hey, class is over" he appears to be winning a fight against Sandy, yet she is supposed to be one of the strongest creatures in Bikini Bottom, so technically she should have been winning.
When Patrick opens his mouth while talking a trombone noise from being stuck in a trombone, the slider goes downwards from a higher-pitched noise to a lower-pitched noise. Correctly, the slider should've been sliding upwards.